


Crystal Ball

by orphan_account



Series: Crystal Ball AU [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Amputation, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Background Relationships, Bottom Peter Parker, Canon Divergence - Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Childbirth, It only takes 2 years for them to figure it out and gather the stones, Just a universe were dudes can get pregnant, M/M, Minor Original Character(s), Mpreg, Non Omegaverse Mpreg, Pepper Potts & Tony Stark Friendship, Pepper Potts Is a Good Bro, Peter Parker is 22 at the start of the story, Peter didn't dust, Peter is not Spider-Man, Peter wears the Rescue suit and helps in the battle like Pepper did, Pregnant Peter Parker, Sex, Tony survives the snap... barely, Top Tony Stark, background stucky, but May Ned and MJ did, don't judge I warned you, graphic birth, tony is still iron man
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-02
Updated: 2019-12-29
Packaged: 2021-01-20 14:16:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 14
Words: 31,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21283076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: “No!” Peter cried out when he saw what Tony was about to do, his suit holding the infinity stones and a look of pure, raw determination on his face. Putting his thrusters on full blast to hurl himself towards Tony, Peter was seconds too late when Tony snapped and the resulting blast sent Peter landing hard on the ground, wincing even as the Rescue suit took most of the blow.Instantly, Peter was pushing himself back up to scramble towards Tony. “Karen, have FRIDAY run a scan and give me his vitals,” he said, tears already starting to well up as his eyes took in Tony’s form. His whole right side burnt, staring at nothing, unmoving and barely breathing. But he was alive according to FRIDAY. If only he could stay alive for long enough to get help.
Relationships: Peter Parker/Tony Stark
Series: Crystal Ball AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1592176
Comments: 92
Kudos: 663





	1. I've had my chances and I've taken 'em all

**Author's Note:**

> READ THE TAGS. They explain most of the craziness going on here.
> 
> I got a prompt for severely injured!Tony and panicky!Peter. Essentially the prompt was something like this (copy/pasted and then edited for clarity. It came from my lovely commenter that goes by 'Marisa' so thank you! <3 <3)  
'Hurt!Tony panicky!Peter story where like Tony being Iron Man gets hurt from defeating some type of species or robot or whatever decides to ruin humanity and it’s severe where Tony’s in the hospital and he’s unconscious and it’s touch and go and Peter being his wonderful boyfriend is worried beyond compare, scared to death, a crying mess and won’t leave Tony’s side. They don’t think he’ll make it BUT Peter who has been harboring his secret (he’s pregnant) basically tells him he needs to fight to live so he can see their little one come into the world.'
> 
> And then this happened. So. Here y'all go. I am doing this as my NANOWRIMO project so it's gonna be a long one. Peter is older than in the movies. 22 when it starts and he is not Spider-Man but still helps in the battle for Earth in the Rescue suit that Tony originally made for Pepper in the movies. He also didn't dust with Thanos' snap but Ned, MJ, and May did and Peter being so devastated is what drives Tony to figure out a way to undo everything and they manage to get it done in 2 years. 
> 
> (Also slightly inspired by the song 'Crystal Ball' by Pink. Or, rather, thought this up while listening to it.)

“No!” Peter cried out when he saw what Tony was about to do, his suit holding the infinity stones and a look of pure, raw determination on his face. Putting his thrusters on full blast to hurl himself towards Tony, Peter was seconds too late when Tony snapped and the resulting blast sent Peter landing hard on the ground, wincing even as the Rescue suit took most of the blow. 

Instantly, Peter was pushing himself back up to scramble towards Tony. “Karen, have FRIDAY run a scan and give me his vitals,” he said, tears already starting to well up as his eyes took in Tony’s form. His whole right side burnt, staring at nothing, unmoving and barely breathing. But he was alive according to FRIDAY. If only he could stay alive for long enough to get help. 

“Hey, Tony, hey, look at me, darling, Tony you did it - we did it,” Peter said through his tears, reaching out to cradle the unburnt side of Tony’s face in his hand. “Hey, no, stay with me. Don’t - You have to stay with me, Tony. We’re going to have a baby. Don’t you want to meet them?” Peter whispered to him - he’d found out just days before the battle that he was pregnant but, after nearly losing Tony more than once, Peter wasn’t going to let him go into this fight alone. He was planning on telling him as soon as they got home while celebrating their victory - because victory was the only option here. They couldn’t fail. And they didn’t.

“Pete,” Tony’s lips moved around his name but sound barely came out before his eyes were closing and body going limp. 

But FRIDAY still got a reading. He wasn’t gone yet and if Peter had any say in it, Tony was going to survive this.

\---

_ "I'm sorry, I don't um… What?" Peter squeaked into the phone. "There's - there has to be a mistake I'm not - I can't - I've gone through fertility tests they said I'd most likely need to do in-vitro if I wanted to carry a child - that like there's a 2% chance I'd get pregnant without at least being on hormones."_

_"Well, Mr. Parker, apparently some sort of miracle happened because you are definitely pregnant. I'm sorry if this isn't the news you were hoping for. If you’d like we can set up an appointment to talk about your options at this point in time.”_

_“Options?” Peter asked before it dawned on him what the phone-nurse was talking about. “Uh no, no that’s… That’s not necessary, thanks,” he said. There was no question or doubts that he was keeping it despite the shock. At least if they all made it through the battle that was no doubt going to come in a few days. _

_Hanging up the phone, Peter squeezed his eyes shut and took a few deep, measured breaths before he kept working on some last-minute tweaks to the Rescue suit that Tony had made for him long ago as a defense mechanism. Throwing a few extra lines of code into the AI and hooking it’s system up to FRIDAY’s so he could still communicate with Tony and be alerted if anything happened to him in case they got separated. But, since it wasn’t Tony’s creation, there was no way Tony could override it and kick him off the battlefield. Peter just hoped Tony wouldn’t snoop and figure out that Peter had taken FRIDAY off the suit and installed his own AI - Karen, he called it. _

\---

They had to amputate Tony's arm and no one knew if he would survive the surgery. The risks were laid out in front of Peter in a painfully blunt way as he signed the paperwork and the next four hours dragged by painfully slowly. People trickled in to keep him company - Steve, Rhodey, Pepper and Happy - until the doctor came out to announce that the surgery was a success and Peter could go see Tony.

They warned him that Tony wasn’t out of the woods yet, though. That a lot could still happen. That he’d probably be in and out of consciousness and in a lot of pain despite the morphine drip he was hooked up to. 

Peter hesitantly walked into the ICU room. Tony hooked up to several IV drips and monitors. He wasn’t awake yet, but Peter didn’t care. He just pulled up a chair at Tony’s unburnt side and gently wrapped a hand around Tony’s. Waiting for him to wake up and idly watching the IV drip and the monitor that showed Tony’s heartbeat until he felt Tony’s hand twitch and he quickly looked over at his boyfriend.

“Pete…?” 

“Hey,” he smiled, tears of relief starting to quickly well up. “You scared me,” he muttered shakily, standing so he could reach out and cup Tony’s cheek. 

All he got in response was a pained moan. 

“I know, darling. They said you’d probably hurt a lot. The pain will get better as you heal. It might take a while but you’re at the best hospital in New York and they’re pulling out all the stops for you. Only the best surgeons and specialists,” Peter told him softly. “And I’m going to be right here the whole time. I’m not leaving you.”

Tony managed to reach up and grasp Peter's hand again before his eyes fluttered closed and he drifted off. 

Peter sighed and curled up in the chair again. He didn't even think to call May, MJ, or Ned until Pepper came in and suggested it. Just too worried about Tony to remember that his family and friends had come back.

Leaning down to gently kiss the back of Tony's hand before he left the room so he could dial May's number.

It took a while to calm her down enough and explain everything properly before breaking the news that Tony was severely injured and that they were at the New York-Presbyterian Hospital. Despite her dislike of Tony and shock of returning after dusting and finding out almost 2 years had passed, she said she'd be there as soon as possible. He didn’t tell her about the pregnancy. He just wasn’t ready to face that yet. It’s not like he could be very far along - maybe 6 or 7 weeks. Hell, he hasn’t even had an ultrasound yet. 

He didn’t call Ned or MJ. Not yet. His mental and emotional capacity just wasn’t where it needed to be to go through that explanation again. Just went back to Tony’s room to sit next to Pepper and not thinking twice about laying his head against her shoulder when the woman put an arm around him. She was probably the only other person in the world that knew exactly what he was going through. The only other person that loved and cared for Tony as much as he did. Just… in a different way.

They didn’t talk. Just sat there and watched the monitors and Tony sleeping until a nurse came in to tell Peter that his Aunt was there.

\---

_ “Peter, I need to talk to you. Now,” May said in that parental voice she’s mastered over the years as Peter walked in - coming back from University to stay with May over spring break. _

_“Um… Okay, yeah, what’d I do?” Peter asked, frowning as he set his backpack and laptop bag down and looked up at his Aunt. His heart skipped a beat when she shoved her phone in his face with some news site pulled up to a picture of himself and Tony, the billionaire’s arm snaked around his waist and both of them grinning ear to ear as they walked out of some fancy restaurant Peter forgot the name of. _

_“What the fuck is this, Pete? I knew you were seeing someone but… Tony Stark? No. Uh uh. Not happening. I know you’re an adult but he’s old enough to be your father! And I don’t care how many good deeds he’s done as Iron Man, he’s not a good person. He’s going to end up breaking your heart, Pete. I don’t want to see that happen to you,” May stressed, tucking her phone back into her pocket._

_Peter let her talk, not looking at her and fighting back against the hot spikes of anger that danced along his veins when she said Tony wasn’t a good person. “If it weren’t for Tony, I’d be dead,” Peter quickly replied, a bite of that anger in his voice before he took in a deep breath and let it out. “And…” he started again, calmer, “Believe it or not we have a lot in common. He’s super smart and - and now I’ve got a guaranteed spot at SI when I graduate. Plus, like, you don’t see it because y’know public appearance and whatnot but… Tony is really sweet. And caring.”_

_“I still don’t like this, Peter. I guess I can’t force you to stop seeing him but… I don’t think it’s a good idea to be with someone like him,” May said, shaking her head and walking into the kitchen to keep doing dishes._

_Peter frowned as he watched her. He had been planning on breaking it to her slowly but apparently nothing could go as planned. The rest of that day was tense. And the next day. And the day after that. May was just starting to calm down about it towards the end of Peter’s break. Still making it clear that she wasn’t happy about the relationship but that she’d support Peter’s choices (also adding that she’d be there when Tony breaks Peter’s heart but Peter decided to ignore that little quip.) _

\---

“Peter!” May gasped when she saw him, instantly pulling him into a tight hug. “Oh sweetie, you look horrible. You’re not hurt, are you?”

“Just some bruises and scrapes,” Peter muttered, melting into the hug and wrapping his arms around her tightly. “I missed you,” he said, voice cracking slightly as tears quickly welled up and spilled over. “You, Ned, MJ. You were all gone,” he muttered. 

“I know. I’m here now, though,” May whispered soothingly, smoothing down Peter’s hair and not letting go of him until he stopped crying and pulled back. “How’s Tony?” she asked. 

“Not good,” Peter said, sniffling softly and rubbing the tears from his face. “Um… They had to amputate his arm. A-And the surgery went well but… they said there’s still a lot that could happen. His whole right side is covered in burns.”

“I’m sorry, sweetie. I know how much you care about him,” May said softly. She still didn’t particularly approve but now wasn’t the time to talk about that. 

Peter nodded, sighing softly and looking up at May. “I should um… Go back to his room. Just in case he wakes up again,” he said, going with it as May pulled him in for one last hug before he walked back into the ICU.


	2. I just need a compass and a willing accomplice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! I hope everyone is liking this so far. I'm going to try and update daily as I said this is my NANO challenge so it's gonna be a long one. 
> 
> Comments are GREATLY appreciated! They fuel my fire to write and if anyone has any suggestions about future scenes please give them to me and I will do what I can! 
> 
> Otherwise, thanks for the support and I hope you like it! <3 <3 <3

"Peter, you really should come home and rest," Steve said gently, settling a hand onto Peter's shoulder. "At least shower and eat something that's not hospital food. That's probably why you've felt so sick between the stress and cafeteria food."

"That's not why I've been feeling sick," Peter muttered dryly. "And I can't just… leave him. What if he wakes up while I'm gone?"

"Then I'll be here. We can take turns. C'mon Pete, sitting here all day and night isn't healthy. Please? You have to take care of yourself, too," Steve said, squeezing Peter's shoulder. 

Peter sighed heavily, hating that Steve had a point. But after three days he could tell he was starting to smell and the hospital food did suck and did nothing to combat the morning sickness. "Fine,” he grumbled, slowly uncurling himself and standing from the recliner he had made his home in the past 72 hours. “But I’m coming back right after I shower, change, and eat,” he said pointedly. “And I’m trusting you that you’ll call if _anything_ changes.”

“Of course, Peter. Happy’s waiting for you outside,” Steve said.

“Thanks,” Peter said, leaning over to press a soft kiss against Tony’s cheek before he grabbed the hoodie he had taken off earlier and left. 

Upon walking outside, Peter expected the Audi idling near the hospital’s main entrance with Happy inside but he definitely didn’t expect Ned and MJ to be standing outside of the car waiting for him. It took a few seconds for it to fully click in his brain that his two best friends were standing in front of him. Real and solid and alive. It was the first time he’s seen them in two years and logically he knew they were back but there was something different about actually _seeing_ them. 

“Are you okay, Peter?” Ned asked gently as the hoodie Peter was holding fell from his lax fingers to the ground. 

“You trying to catch flies or…?” MJ teased and Peter realized his mouth was hanging open.

“What? No, I just… You’re… Holy shit, I missed you guys,” Peter gasped, pulling both of them in for a tight hug. Both of them easily adjusting and wrapping their arms around Peter.

“Yeah, we heard the last few years have been… weird,” Ned said, squeezing Peter a little tighter when he sucked in a shaky breath. 

“That’s an understatement,” Peter said, trying desperately to stop himself from falling apart again. Between the pregnancy hormones, worrying about Tony, and just the amount of general stress he was dealing with it seemed like anything could get him crying.

MJ pulled back as Peter sniffled and reached up to wipe away the stray tears that had escaped. “Hey, don’t cry. C’mon. Let’s go… do something. We can catch up over lunch - Ned’s treat.”

“What?!” 

Peter couldn’t help but laugh and shake his head. “I can take care of lunch but… I need to go shower first I haven’t for like three days,” he admitted.

“Yeah, you do. I love you, Peter, but you stink,” MJ snorted, shrugging at the offended look that Peter gave her.

“I mean, she’s right,” Ned muttered. “We don’t mind waiting for you, though. We can just hang out with Happy,” he added.

Peter rolled his eyes at them before scooping up the hoodie from the ground and opening the back door of the Audi to slide in - both of the other two following closely as Peter greeted Happy.

\---

_ "Look, Ned, please just help me break this code. I hate that I can’t help them and this fucking suit won’t let me do anything. I have no control over it whatsoever,” Peter sighed, sitting in Tony’s lab with Ned and MJ while God-knows-what went on outside. Another potentially world-ending threat. Thanos is what he was called. And apparently he had some crazy idea that wiping out half of all living creatures would somehow make the universe thrive. Peter honestly didn’t get it. All he knew was that Tony and the rest of the Avengers were out there risking their lives in a battle to try and save everyone and Peter was stuck here. Doing nothing._

_Not for lack of trying, though. But every suit of armor here had FRIDAY built in - even the Rescue suit Tony had specifically built for Peter. And FRIDAY was programmed to send the suit into defense mode if Peter was the one in it. Which meant Peter had no control over them and the AI would be in charge - detecting threats and taking them out while getting Peter to safety as fast as possible. _

_“That’s probably a good thing,” Ned said hesitantly. “I mean, what the Avengers do is like… really dangerous isn’t it? And do you even know how to use one of these things?”_

_“Of course I do,” Peter sighed heavily. He at least had a good idea of how to from watching Tony and the few times he was in the Rescue suit. _

_“I agree with Ned. Seems dangerous and stupid,” MJ commented while she wandered around and idly looked at the various tools and half-finished projects that were strewn about. “Anyways, boyfriend or not, do you really want to go behind Tony Stark’s back and piss off Iron Man himself?”_

_Peter rolled his eyes at her. “It’ll be fine. Once Tony knows I can hold my own in a fight he-” Peter stopped mid-sentence, jaw dropping and eyes going wide as he watched Ned turn to dust in front of him. _

_Distantly, he heard MJ’s panicked shout before it was abruptly cut off and Peter didn’t even have to look to know that she was gone, too and suddenly Peter felt like he was going to vomit. _

_Thanos won. _

\---

“Wait, wait, wait you _live here_ now? Like… full-time?” Ned asked incredulously as Happy pulled up to the Avengers base.

“Yeah,” Peter said, “Um… May also… y’know. So… I didn’t really have anywhere else to go,” he shrugged as they all piled out of the car. “Happy actually was the one that found me and suggested it, though.”

“Well, I couldn’t have just let you waste away on the street. Bossman definitely wouldn’t have been thrilled about that when he came back,” Happy chirped in as he walked inside with them. “And, y’know, you’re a good kid. Kind’ve grown on all of us here,” he added, reaching out to ruffle Peter’s hair.

“Yeah, right. Anyway, don’t break anything. I’m gonna go get clean and change,” Peter said before hurrying off to his and Tony’s room there - ignoring MJ’s lamenting about how he was ‘no fun’. 

He paused just inside the door as a feeling he couldn’t quite describe washed over him. 

Just being here, without Tony. Not knowing when Tony might be back. If he was going to be. 

It was a familiar, yet still horrifyingly terrible feeling. The room was just way too big for him to be there by himself. During the weeks between Thanos snapping and when Tony finally managed to get back from whatever faraway planet he’d been on Peter barely slept. And when he did, it wasn’t in Tony’s bed - their bed. It was in the guest room. Or on the couch. Or the pull-out in Tony’s lab. The bed was just too big and too cold without Tony lying there next to him. 

Taking in a deep breath, Peter pushed forward and rifled around until he found a pair of jeans and fished out one of Tony’s old worn-in T-shirts that he liked to wear. They were faded, but soft and smelled like Tony. He scrubbed himself clean quickly and, after drying off, pulled on the jeans. It was way more difficult than it should have been to button them and Peter debated about digging for a looser pair but he swore these fit just a week ago. 

There was no way he was showing yet. 

Which, he guessed he technically wasn’t, but Peter could see the tiniest curve of his stomach when he stared at himself in the mirror. No one else would have noticed except _maybe_ Tony. And apparently his pants.

Peter ditched those jeans for a more worn-in pair that was easier to get on before he went to find his friends again. He felt a lot better after a shower. More human now that he wasn’t covered in a fine layer of sweat and dirt and blood from the fight. 

They ended up ordering in - Peter honestly wasn’t sure how well he’d fare in a publicly social situation. Especially if someone spotted him and recognized him as Tony’s boyfriend since it’s been plastered over almost every tabloid and several newspapers and news stations for three and a half years. He was almost certain he’d burst into tears if someone started asking him a bunch of questions about Tony and how he was doing right now. 

Anyways, then Peter could keep a better eye on his phone and he wouldn’t have to worry about trying to hear a notification or ring over the noise of a restaurant if Steve had to get ahold of him. 

Which, Steve didn’t call, but Peter did get a call from the midwife’s office that he’d been referred to. He sent it to voicemail - he would call back later to schedule an appointment - but not before MJ got a glimpse of the caller ID. 

“Uh… Peter?” she started after swallowing down the mouthful of lo mein she was chewing on, “Why’s a midwife clinic calling you?” 

Peter hesitated as both his friends turned to stare at him. At least Happy had disappeared to a different room. “I um… Look, guys, no one knows and I don’t want to tell anyone else right now, okay? So please, please, please don’t say anything to anyone? Including May. _Especially_ May. I just found out like a week ago but… uh… I’m pregnant.”

“What? Holy shit, Peter. That’s awesome, dude,” Ned gasped. “You never even told us you could carry.”

“I didn’t know until um… about a year ago? Tony and I started talking about wanting to have kids after undoing the snap and getting married. So I did some testing. They said I could carry but we’d need to go through like a whole hormone regime and probably do in-vitro because I guess I just wasn’t… ovulating. I don’t know. We really just wanted to know if it was possible, we weren’t planning on having any kids for a little while so I didn’t pay too much attention,” Peter rambled. “But, then, uh the nurse I talked to called it a ‘miracle’. I’m not sure I’d go that far but… something happened because I’m pregnant and I’ve definitely not been on hormones.”

“Does Tony know?” MJ asked gently after Peter finally stopped talking.

Taking in a deep breath, Peter shrugged. “I-I don’t think so? I um… I told him right after he snapped but I think he was too out of it to remember. He hasn’t said anything or asked about it. If he remembered I think he would’ve said something last time he woke up,” Peter said. Tony had been lucid enough to ask Peter if he’s seen his Aunt or friends yet and if everyone else was okay. So he remembered that they’d brought everyone back. 

“You know what you could do - you could get like a ‘get well soon’ card and tape an ultrasound picture inside!” Ned suggested. “That would be so cute. Don’t you think, MJ?”

“Cute enough to make me want to puke. And super cheesy… But you guys are both dorks so I think Tony would like that,” MJ said. 

Peter couldn’t help but smile at his friend’s suggestions. “Yeah, I have to schedule and have the ultrasound first, though,” he chuckled.

“Want us to come with you? I mean - since you don’t want anyone else to know yet. I have nothing going on the next couple days,” MJ offered, looking over at Ned.

“Same. Just say the word and we’ll be there,” Ned confirmed, reaching out to pat Peter on the shoulder.

“You guys are the best. I’ll call that office back and make an appointment and um… I’ll see if I can just get it done at the same hospital Tony’s staying at,” Peter said. It was a huge hospital campus and he knew there was a separate outpatient radiology department that did X-rays, CAT scans, and ultrasounds on the same campus. 

Peter didn’t waste any more time calling the midwife’s office back. At first, they said they wouldn’t be able to do the ultrasound on the hospital’s campus until Peter casually mentioned that his boyfriend - Tony Stark - was in that hospital and Peter didn’t want to be far away. Then suddenly everything changed and the lady he was talking to quickly said, “No problem at all, Mr. Parker. How does Thursday at 11AM sound?”

“Thursday at 11?” Peter repeated, looking between Ned and MJ to make sure they heard and nodded their approval before he confirmed with the receptionist and hung up.


	3. Sometimes you think everything is wrapped inside a diamond ring

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm managing to keep up so far which means I've done better than last year. 
> 
> This chapter has a lot more focus on Tony and Peter's relationship bc that was lacking. Also, Peter is frustrated because everyone keeps figuring out that he's pregnant before he wants to tell them. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you all like it! And, again, comments are greatly appreciated!!! <3 <3

_”D’you want kids?”_

_Peter paused, his fork loaded up with a bite of syrupy pancakes halfway to his mouth when Tony asked the question. “Um… I guess?” Peter answered before shoving the food into his mouth to continue eating. _

_“Hmm,” Tony hummed as he poured himself another cup of coffee and turned to stare over at his boyfriend, leaning against the kitchen counter. “I do,” he said. “When you’re ready. After we get your Aunt and friends back. After we get married.”_

_Peter couldn’t help but wince slightly at that, chewing on his lip and idly stabbing at the remainder of his breakfast. “Tony, we don’t even know if that can happen. It’s all… speculation. We can’t know if-”_

_“No, baby, I’m getting your family back. No ‘if’s about it, I’m going to find a way,” Tony said firmly. _

_Frowning, Peter shook his head and stood up to scrape his plate off into the trash and go wash it. “I don’t want you to,” he said shortly, frustration and fear welling up quickly inside of him because they’ve had this conversation before._

_“Pete, you don’t smile anymore. Not really. I know you don’t think it’s possible but Scott’s got a good idea going and, with some tweaks, I think we can do it,” Tony said. _

_“You mean his whole ‘Back to the Future’ plan? You said it yourself that was stupid - and dangerous,” Peter rolled his eyes at him._

_“I mean... Like I said, with some tweaking-”_

_“I said I don’t want you to,” Peter repeated with a little more force, closing his eyes and taking in a deep, shaky breath before slowly letting it out. _

_“Why?”_

_That one little word was what broke Peter, tossing his plate apparently a little too hard into the sink because he could hear it shattering as he spun around to face Tony. “Because I can’t lose you, too!” he shouted, chest heaving and tears quickly welling up. “I already almost have so - so many times, Tony. Y-You don’t get it. You don’t… You were gone for _two months_ after everyone turned to dust! I thought you were gone for good, too. And - And before that there was that whole Sokovia thing and - fuck, Tony, I never know if you’re going to come back to me or not a-and I’ve already lost literally every other single person on this planet that I considered family I c-can’t… p-please, Tony, d-don’t j-just… just d-d-don’t,” Peter stuttered, very quickly turning into a hysterical, blubbering mess._

_It was a wonder how he managed not to collapse before Tony’s arms wrapped around him and he clung tightly onto those strong shoulders as sobs wracked his whole body. Tony scooped him up and Peter was only vaguely aware of the sweet nothings being whispered into his ear as he was carried to the living room - ugly crying the whole way - and then settled into Tony’s lap once he was sitting on the couch._

_Peter cried so hard it hurt but it wasn’t the first time that’s happened. In fact, it happened a lot during the two months before Tony came back._

_This time he had Tony to help hold him together, though. Pressing kisses against the top of his head and rubbing his hands up and down Peter’s arms and back until the sobs finally quieted and, eventually, stopped. _

_“I’m not going anywhere, love,” Tony reassured him softly, shifting Peter slightly so he could reach out and grab the box of tissues to hand to Peter. “If you really, truly, don’t want me to do this… I won’t. All I want is to make you happy, baby boy.”_

_Peter didn’t say anything yet, using a few tissues to wipe away the tears and blow his nose. “I-I don’t. I don’t want you to. I can’t take that chance,” he sniffled, laying his cheek against Tony’s shoulder. “I want to marry you. A-and have kids with you. I want to have a family with you. Not - Not right now. But… in a few years? Point is I can’t do that if you’re not around.”_

_“I’ll be here, sweetheart, I promise,” Tony said, carding a hand through Peter’s messy hair. _

\---

The nurses at the hospital’s ICU were absolutely wonderful. Peter couldn’t thank them enough for their continuous care not only of Tony, but of himself as well. They always made sure he had fresh blankets and pillows at night and always offered drinks - tea, hot chocolate, coffee, water - and sometimes would bring in a pitcher of water or a pot of coffee to leave there in case he wanted some later. They also made sure the room was fully stocked with snacks at all times.

However, Peter was starting to wonder if maybe a few of them had started to catch on to his little secret with how much they’ve begun fussing over him recently. Also the sudden switch from normal to decaffeinated coffee left for him. It probably wasn’t too hard to figure out for someone in the medical field between his frequent bathroom trips in the early hours of the day, the fact that he’s worn nothing except sweaters and leggings the past four days, and how he would subconsciously find one of his hands resting on his stomach almost constantly. 

And, maybe, Peter had a habit of talking in his sleep. 

It was really only a matter of time before everyone else started catching on, too and Peter should have known that Pepper would figure it out before long. She was crazy observant and they’ve been spending a lot of time together at the hospital. 

‘Before long’ happened to be the exact second that Peter stepped back into Tony’s room after the ultrasound. Pictures stuffed deep into his laptop bag and clutching a Chai he got from the cafe downstairs in his hand that he choked on when Pepper spoke.

“So when are you planning on telling me?”

“What?” Peter coughed, looking over to see Tony still asleep. “I-I don’t… Um…”

“Seriously, kid? You think I wouldn’t notice the morning sickness, how you suddenly stopped drinking coffee, and you _willingly_ left earlier for a um… ‘doctor’s appointment’. I’m not stupid. Or blind. I know,” she said gently. “I won’t tell anyone else but please at least be honest with me.”

Staring wide-eyed at her, Peter knew he was caught. He couldn’t lie. He was horrible at lying. “I-I um… D’you wanna see the ultrasound pictures?” he asked instead in a small, quiet voice. 

Pepper’s face broke into a smile and she nodded. “Of course.” 

Peter put down his tea before digging through his laptop bag to find the printouts. He handed them over to Pepper and sat down next to her. “Found out I’m like… 10 weeks already,” he said, a little sheepishly because he had definitely not expected that. Then again, he had been feeling weird - sick, tired, sore - for a while before he actually went to get checked out. Still. Two and a half months. No wonder his jeans were starting to get too tight to wear. “That’s it’s head there and if you look close you can even start to see the baby’s hands and feet here and… here.” 

“Pete…?”

The worried, pain-filled voice coming from the bed had Peter instantly rushing over to Tony. It was rather endearing, every time he woke up it was Peter’s name on his lips. But that’s also why Peter was so hesitant to leave. He never wanted to be gone when Tony needed him. 

“I’m right here, darling,” Peter soothed, taking Tony’s hand in both of his. “How’re you feeling? Any better?” 

“Well… Now that you’re here,” Tony muttered, voice hoarse and quiet but he still managed half a smile and Peter’s heart swelled. 

How Tony could be so cheesy and sweet right now was beyond Peter but it made Peter love him even more than he already did. “God, I love you,” he muttered, leaning down to kiss Tony softly.

“Mm, y’know I usually go by ‘Tony’ but… whatever suits you,” Tony joked, earning an eye roll from Peter. “I love you, too, babe,” he whispered, squeezing Peter’s hand. 

“You should rest, honey,” Peter said, “You have a lot of healing to do. Gotta grow that arm back,” he teased, earning another little smile from Tony.

“I don’t think that’s how it works,” Tony commented, “Maybe you should go back to that human biology class you skipped in college.” 

Peter couldn’t help a soft laugh, bringing Tony’s hand up so he could kiss against the back of his hand. 

“So…” Tony started after a moment. “Who’s having a baby?” he asked and Peter’s stomach lurched.

So much for telling Tony in a cutesy, cheesy way. Peter was starting to think he should just make an official announcement since everyone was figuring it out whether he wanted them to or not.

Peter glanced over his shoulder towards Pepper who shrugged unhelpfully at him. 

“We are,” he muttered after another moment of silence, looking back at Tony to watch his reaction. 

“What… How?” 

“Maybe you should come with me to that biology class,” Peter couldn’t help but joke.

“You’re serious?” Tony asked, staring up at Peter. “You’re… You’re really pregnant?”

“Yeah, Tony,” Peter said softly, reaching out to get the ultrasound pictures from Pepper. “This is our baby,” he said. “I was um… gonna get you like a card and put this picture in it to tell you,” he admitted. “I’ll get like a frame or something to put it in later and we can keep it on this little table.” 

“Yeah,” Tony agreed. “Weren’t we supposed to get married first? What happened to that?”

“We decided the chances of pregnancy were low enough and our dislike of condoms was high enough to take the chance,” Peter chuckled. “And I still want to marry you. As soon as you’re physically able to stand at the altar. Now please, Tony, rest.”

“Yeah,” Tony agreed again - already struggling to stay awake between the various medications he was on and the pain.

\---

_”I can’t wait to have a family with you,” Tony muttered, spooning up close behind Peter and slipping a hand under Peter’s shirt to press against his stomach. “Baby, you have no idea how much it means to me that you’re willing to carry our children.”_

_Peter couldn’t help but smile, settling a hand on top of Tony’s. “‘Course. Now that I know I’m able to I wouldn’t want it any other way,” he said, sighing contentedly when Tony pressed a few kisses along his shoulder and neck. _

_Finally, after over a year, Peter was just starting to come to terms with everything and feel like he might be ready to move on. The pain and grief was still there, but not as prevalent and not as intense. He felt like he could actually look forward to starting a family with Tony without the guilt and feeling that he was abandoning his Aunt and friends. _

_“We should celebrate,” Tony suggested, hand sliding up to Peter’s chest as he nipped at the younger man’s neck. _

_Peter couldn’t stop the little whine that came from him, tilting his head and rolling his hips back against Tony’s. “You just wanna fuck me,” he teased. _

_“Hell yeah, I do,” Tony chuckled, already reaching to their bedside table for the lube and condoms. _

_Peter rolled onto his back, watching Tony and chewing on his lip for a minute. “Do we need the condoms anymore…?” he asked before he could help himself. _

_Tony hesitated, looking between Peter and the foil packet he had in his hand. “I mean… Doc said there’s still a chance.”_

_“Yeah but… if it happens then… would it really be that bad?” Peter asked. _

_“No,” Tony said slowly. “You’re sure…? I don’t want you to regret this.” _

_“I won’t,” Peter promised, taking the condom from Tony and tossing it off to the side - not even caring where it went - before he pulled Tony down into a hard kiss._


	4. All my doubts that fill my head

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all kept calling me a tease and asking for smut... so here's some smut. Among other things, of course. 
> 
> Anyways, as always I hope you all like it and I appreciate every single comment. It always makes my day when I see the email notification that I've gotten a comment on this!! <3

_ Peter couldn’t lie, he was hoping he’d get pregnant when they ditched the condoms. Realistically he knew that probably wasn’t going to happen but it didn’t stop him from hoping. It also didn’t stop him from jumping Tony any chance he got. _

_Tony didn’t seem bothered by the sudden increase in their sex life. Especially when Peter started walking around in nothing but big T-shirts or oversized sweaters and panties. Which… the panties were new. He’d only seen Peter wear them on special occasions when he wanted to really work Tony up but now he was regularly wearing them. Ones he’d bought before and some new ones that Tony didn’t recognize. _

_Today, he was wearing a new pair that caught Tony’s eye as Peter leaned across the kitchen counter to grab… something. Tony didn’t even know what because his eyes were trained on the fucking Captain America shield printed on the ass of the panties Peter was wearing underneath the oversized sweater he had on. “Are you fucking kidding me?” Tony couldn’t help but grumble under his breath, moving without hardly realizing it until he was grasping Peter’s hips tightly and pinning him to the counter. “Wanna explain these?” he growled, snapping the band of the offending panties and relishing in the gasp Peter let out._

_“U-Um… they were out of Iron Man…?” Peter squeaked. _

_“Mmhmm, I’m sure they were.” Tony didn’t hesitate at all to rip the panties off of Peter. The fabric tearing loudly but easily. Obviously they were a cheap pair and Tony had an idea Peter was hoping for that reaction. _

_By the breathless moan that Peter let out, Tony was right. _

_“Fuck, baby boy, if I had any lube around I’d finger you open and fuck you right here over this counter. Make you forget Cap even exists,” he growled, sliding his hands up Peter’s sides under the sweater to tweak at his nipples. He gasped softly when Peter pushed his hips back and rolled them, effectively grinding his ass against the crotch of Tony’s sweats. _

_“‘M already all prepped and lubed. Shouldn’t need more. Just fuck me,” Peter said breathlessly, whining softly when Tony pinched one of his nipples hard. _

_“Jesus christ, Pete. If I knew any better I’d think you were trying to get me to knock you up,” Tony said and he didn’t miss the way that Peter’s breath hitched when he said that._

_Huh._

_“Tony, please, just… C’mon,” he whined, grinding back against Tony again and he could feel him start to get hard but his movements were stopped when Tony leaned down over him, effectively pinning him to the counter with very little room left for movement._

_“Hold on, sweetheart, are you… Is that what this is?” Tony asked, kissing and nipping at Peter’s shoulder. “Are you trying to get pregnant?”_

_“I-I um… No?” Peter squeaked, face flushing red even as his cock twitched at Tony’s words and the way that he was biting at his shoulder. No doubt leaving some hickies while he was at it. _

_“Not sure if I believe that, baby boy,” Tony said, rolling his hips against Peter’s before he straightened up and grabbed a handful of Peter’s ass. And okay, even if he wanted to he wouldn’t have been able to stop the painfully aroused noise he made - right along with Peter’s own desperate moan - when he was, far too easily, able to press a thumb into his wet hole. Then again, Peter said he’d prepped himself already. _

_“Maybe you shouldn’t,” Peter admitted._

_“Fuck,” Tony couldn’t help but grunt. “That is… way hotter than it should be,” he muttered - more to himself than Peter - and didn’t waste any more time shoving his sweatpants down and slowly pushing inside of Peter. _

_It was more of a stretch than normal and burned a little but Peter loved every second of it. Especially when Tony started talking again._

_“Shoulda told me before, baby. Shit, I can’t wait until you’re all round and glowing,” Tony said between ragged breaths, squeezing a hand between Peter and the counter so he could press it against Peter’s flat stomach as he slowly pulled out and pushed back in. “God, I can just imagine how you’ll look when you start to show,” he continued, starting up a slow pace and grinding deep inside of Peter. “Bet you’ll get all sensitive and needy, too. More than you already are. Fuck, Pete, you-”_

_Tony was cut off by Peter letting out a high pitched moan of his name, shaking and clenching around him. It took Tony’s brain a few seconds to catch up and realize that Peter just fucking came. “Don’t stop,” he whined, rolling his hips and whimpering. “Want you to cum inside me.”_

_“You don’t have to ask me twice,” Tony said, gripping onto Peter’s hips. _

\---

Now that Tony knew, the news spread quickly. Soon almost everyone knew - except May. But the rest of the team did. And it was pretty entertaining to watch a bunch of huge, muscular men coo and aww over an ultrasound picture. Happy nearly started bawling and there was a fight over who would be the god-parents which was very quickly put to an end when Peter and Tony agreed that Pepper would be the baby’s god-mother.

Tony was doing well, too. They were starting to talk about moving him to a normal room but the chance of infection was still uncomfortably high because of the burns. But, so far, he was healing well and more conscious throughout the day.

All in all, things were looking up. 

Of course, the time came when Peter had to tell May and that had to be the most nerve-wracking moment of his life. 

May had come by to take him to lunch since they haven’t been able to talk much since everything happened and, after ensuring that Rhodey would stay with Tony and had his phone number, he left to meet May in the waiting room. 

“Hey,” Peter greeted as May pulled him into a tight hug. 

“Hey, Pete. I’m not saying I don’t like your outfit but… don’t you want to change before we go out?” she asked teasingly, pulling back to look him up and down.

Peter rolled his eyes. He was wearing what had quickly become his usual lately - black leggings and an oversized knit sweater. Which, yeah, maybe for a guy it was a little different but none of Peter’s jeans fit anymore. At least not comfortably. “I gotta be comfy when I spend most of my time at the hospital,” he said. “It’s fine. Unless you’re embarrassed of me,” Peter said with a fake pout.

“No, of course not,” May chuckled. “C’mon, let’s go eat. I’m sure you’re dying for something that’s not hospital food."

“Yeah,” Peter said, walking out with May and trying to build up the courage he’d need to tell her about the pregnancy.

They ended up at a Panera, ordering food and finding a place to sit. And, heart pounding out of his chest, Peter blurted it out before anything could interrupt. 

“I’m pregnant.”

“What?” May choked out, eyes going wide at him. “I-I don’t think I heard that right. You um… what?”

Peter took in a deep breath. “I am pregnant,” he said, slower this time but was met with silence and, of course, had a nagging urge to fill that silence. “A lot has changed in the past two years a-and um… Tony and I have been living together - you knew that part. But we also planned on getting married - still do - and uh… decided we wanted a kid so I went to a specialist for some testing and we found out that I could carry - they said I’d need hormone treatment and maybe in-vitro so I guess we just stopped being careful about it. We wanted to get married first but it wasn’t completely unplanned and definitely not unwanted. And uh…” Peter trailed off, realizing he was rambling. “I have ultrasound pictures… If-if you wanna see?” Peter offered timidly.

“That’s um… Pete, that’s a lot of - of information to take in right now. Uh… I don’t know what to say,” May muttered. 

“Maybe… congratulations? That - that you’re happy for us?” Peter offered, though he wasn’t sure if that would be true.

“Pete, honey, you know how I feel about you and Tony. I mean, I guess you’ve been together for - we were gone for two so... four years now but that doesn’t change the fact that he’s so much older than you. I just - Just give me a few days to uh… come to terms with everything. It’s hard to believe that two years have passed by and I can’t help but still think you’re barely 20, supposed to be living with me, and still in college,” May sighed, shaking her head. “Of course if you’re happy then… so am I. And… As much as I hate saying it, I suppose I owe Tony a big thanks.”

Well, it could’ve gone worse so Peter just forced a small smile and nodded. “Yeah. I am happy.”

\---

_ ”Tony? Darling?” Peter called out as he walked into the lab, half-asleep after waking up at 2 in the morning to an empty bed. “What’re you doing?” he asked once he found Tony. Barely even paying attention to the digital model displayed in front of him. _

_“I um… I had an idea. A thought. that’s all. Don’t worry about it, I’ll come back to bed soon,” Tony said, though he was still staring at the model._

_“Idea for what…?” Peter asked. He came around to look at what Tony was seeing and he was suddenly wide awake, feeling his heart plummeting just as quickly as anger rose when he saw that Tony was trying to figure out fucking _time travel_ despite their earlier conversations - and fights - over it. “Tony,” he said lowly, a warning and a plea. _

_“Babe, I just - I just wanted to know if it was possible, okay? Which… it’s not. It’s not. I know now that it’s not. It wouldn’t even be… I wasn’t going to do anything with it - I promise. I was just curious,” Tony said quickly, turning around in his chair and taking both of Peter’s hands. _

_“Tony,” Peter groaned, rolling his eyes at him. “You’re never going to let it go, are you?” he asked in a pained voice, looking over Tony’s head at the model. Blinking a few times, Peter tilted his head at it. Almost. But not quite. Though, Peter could see where Tony had gone wrong. Sighing heavily, he pulled a chair over and sat next to Tony. _

_“Hey, sweetheart, let’s just… we can go to bed. I’m sorry, it was stupid - I should’ve known it wouldn’t work and even if it did I-” Tony hesitated as Peter toyed with the model with a cold, calculating look on his face. “Baby-”_

_“FRIDAY, run it, please,” Peter said softly, chewing on his lip as the changes loaded._

_“Holy shit,” Tony gasped when FRIDAY announced a successful run. “Pete, you… you did it.”_

_“There’s your fucking time travel. Happy now?” Peter scoffed as he got back up. “Y’know what? You don’t have to come to bed. I don’t care. Do what you want - you will anyways,” he said sourly as he left, ignoring Tony’s sorries and pleas. _

_Even as he slammed doors and buried himself under blankets, anger wasn’t at the forefront of Peter’s mind. No. It was doubt and guilt and a million other feelings. Including a small glimmer of hope._

_They could, realistically, do it. _

_Just knowing that made everything different. What sort of person would Peter be - having the means to bring back everyone that had dusted and deciding not to? Even worse, convincing other people not to. _

_He’d be no better than Thanos. _


	5. Just to end up right back here on the floor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I actually have a few chapters done but I've been trying to write more - edit less. I'm trying my best to keep up with NANO. But uh... Here ya go. 
> 
> Some angst happens so be prepared.
> 
> Also, comments are much appreciated and fuel my desire to write!! So please, if you could, leave a quick comment!

In just a week, Peter’s stomach went from being just barely curved to having a more defined bump. Still not noticeable under the sweaters he wore unless he sat a certain way but he could see the change if he wasn’t wearing a shirt and he was sure it would show if he wore anything more fitted.

“Didn’t think I’d start showing so soon, but I guess I am like… almost three months along - I keep forgetting that,” Peter chuckled, sweater held up by his chest so Tony could see the curve of his stomach. Half kneeling on the bed and smiling as Tony reached out to press his hand against the bump. 

“Why do you keep hiding under those sweaters?” Tony asked, rubbing circles on Peter’s skin with his thumb. “Everyone knows now.” 

Peter shrugged. “They’re comfy,” he said, “And the hospital’s always cold.”

“Hmm, I guess you have a point,” Tony sighed, “Still, means I don’t get to enjoy your cute little belly as much since I’m trapped here.”

“You are here for a very good reason, darling,” Peter said, resting a hand over Tony’s on his stomach. “Maybe if you didn’t pull such a stupid stunt you’d be able to enjoy it more.”

“That stupid stunt made sure we didn’t all turn to dust,” Tony quipped back. 

“Peter, Mr. Stark, sorry to interrupt I just need to get a read on some vitals,” a nurse said, making Peter jump slightly and let go of his sweater - letting it fall back over his stomach.

“Sorry,” Peter muttered, face turning red as he scrambled out of the way and let her do her job. She was one of the really nice ones that fussed over Peter and made sure he was comfortable and had water and snacks. 

“It’s okay. The first kid is a really exciting thing. And hey, if you need anything at all just let us know. I'll bring a pitcher of water down once I'm done here,” she told him as she jotted a few things down but paused and frowned after taking Tony’s temperature. “Got a little fever going there, we’ll want to keep an eye on it.”

Peter just idly watched, thanking her as she left. She didn’t seem too worried about the fever so Peter decided he shouldn’t panic yet, either. 

"Hey, Pete why don't you have Happy pick you and your friends up. Have lunch. Go shopping. Grab some maternity clothes - you'll need them soon," Tony suggested. "Just swing by home and grab one of my cards first."

"I don't need your money. Y'know I've got my own money that I can use," Peter huffed, crossing his arms over his chest and sending a teasing pout towards Tony. 

"Yeah but you’re not going to," Tony stated, laughing when Peter rolled his eyes.

"Maybe. You don’t know that,” Peter scoffed, holding the pout for a few seconds before sighing heavily and shrugging. “Look, people are nicer to me when I have a platinum card that has your name on it, okay?"

"Yeah, I bet they are," Tony said. “So, like I said, grab my card and go get yourself some nice new clothes. Maybe something sexy for when I come home,” Tony teased with a wink - earning himself another eye roll from Peter.

\---

_Peter was absolutely vibrating with excitement as he spotted Ned and MJ at the spot they’d usually meet up at to study. “Holy shit guys, you’re never going to believe what happened to me yesterday,” he said, sitting down and grinning at his friends. Ned and MJ just staring wide-eyed at him. No doubt mortified by his current state - stitches along his cheek, arm in a sling, and absolutely covered in cuts and bruises… But none of that really mattered to him right now._

_“Shit, dude, are you okay?” Ned gasped._

_“Oh my God, Peter, what happened?” MJ asked, her response overlapping Ned’s._

_“What? Oh, yeah um… Aliens? I don’t really know. A building almost fell on me. Don’t worry about it - that’s not what I’m talking about an-”_

_“Aliens? What the fuck, Peter? How are you _not_ talking about that?” MJ scoffed incredulously. _

_“No, no, wait, a building almost fell on you? Peter what - Hold on, I just - let me get this straight. You saw aliens and almost got killed by a falling building, but that’s not important?” Ned asked, more confused than he’s ever been before._

_“Guys, you’re not listening to me. Just - let me talk, okay? Because something way better happened than nearly being killed by weird aliens and falling buildings,” Peter told them, unfazed by how MJ and Ned shared a worried look and about to start talking again when Ned spoke up._

_“Did you… Peter, did you hit your head when that building fell or…? You’re not making any sense,” Ned asked slowly._

_“No! Just - shut up for a minute, okay? Look, so, I was just kinda walking around and whatever. I guess I missed the memo that the Avengers would be fighting aliens on Tuesday but like then all of a sudden this huge thing crashed into one of those like big apartment buildings that was like… right in front of me. And, like, I totally thought I was going to die. But then Iron Man fucking just like… grabbed me. Like literally grabbed my arm and flew me away from the falling bricks. It was seriously the craziest fucking thing ever. But like… that wasn’t all, either. I guess I got hit by some of the debris so I was bleeding a lot and he said he wanted to make sure I was okay, right? So after they took out the aliens he came back and we started talking while waiting for the paramedics and um…” Peter paused, having to take a moment to breathe after spitting everything else out in one long breath before he started again - slower, this time. “He asked me out. Like… on a date,” Peter finished, breathless and sounding like he hardly believed it himself. Which, honestly? He couldn’t._

_The twin blank stares he was getting didn’t help._

_“Guys, did you not hear me? Tony Stark asked me out. Iron Man asked me out. I might get to fuck Iron Man. Which, by the way, Tony Stark is way hotter in person. Just in case you were wondering.” _

_“No… I, I really wasn’t wondering,” MJ said, taking in a deep breath. “You... Peter, are you sure you didn’t hit your head? That kind of sounds like some sort of weird wet dream fantasy of yours that I think you’ve told me about before. Pretty sure you might’ve hallucinated all that.”_

_“Well if you don’t believe me I’ll just have to get a picture with him when we have our date Saturday night,” Peter scoffed. “He’s taking me out to… well, I’m really not sure where. He said he’d pick me up at 7. So. We’ll see.”_

_“Right,” Ned said slowly. “So… aside from the obvious concussion and hallucinations, you’re okay?”_

_Peter screwed his eyes shut, sucking in another deep breath to try and suppress the urge to hit Ned right upside the head. “I’m not - Oh my God. Fine. Don’t believe me,” he grumbled, grabbing his laptop bag and standing back up._

_“Where are you going?” Ned asked._

_“Somewhere else. Around people that don’t think I’m hallucinating and going crazy,” Peter snorted._

_“Right. Well. We’ll be here. Bye!” MJ called out as Peter sulked away. _

\---

“Are you okay?” Peter asked softly, sitting on the edge of Tony’s bed. Dressed in a pair of maternity jeans he got and, per Tony’s request, a more fitted sweater that was still warm and stretchy but would show off the curve of his stomach which definitely got Tony’s approval.

“Hm?” Tony muttered, focusing his eyes back on Peter. “Yeah, yeah ‘m fine. I um… What were you saying? I just… lost focus.”

“If you’re tired I can stop talking and let you rest,” Peter offered, reaching up to smooth back Tony’s hair and frowning at how warm he felt. “Think you still have a fever,” Peter said, leaning down to kiss Tony softly. 

“No, no it’s… I’m fine,” he muttered after returning the kiss, though Peter could tell he was struggling to stay awake. “Jus’ kinda tired.”

“Yeah, so you should rest,” Peter chuckled, taking Tony’s hand. “I’ll be right here when you wake up, darling. You know that,” he said, watching fondly as Tony quickly lost his struggle to stay awake and dozed off.

After a few minutes, Peter stood from the bed to change back into his earlier, much comfier outfit, and settle into the recliner. He pulled out his phone just to send out a general text to everyone about making sure Tony rested and had breaks between visitors so he wouldn’t try and force himself to stay up if his body needed rest. 

Tony slept the rest of the day except when he was woken up to take medication and for the nurses to change the bandages on his burns. Which apparently a few of them weren’t looking great - the nurses assured Peter it would be okay, though, when he worried about it. That they’d talk about upping the antibiotic and would keep a close eye on it. 

That didn’t help Peter’s worrying, though. First the fever and now this. As well as Tony’s been doing, a bad infection could still be deadly and Peter found himself having a much harder time than usual falling asleep. He’d gotten used to sleeping in the recliner by now. The heated blankets the nurses brought in always helped and it wasn’t too bad when it was fully reclined but his worried thoughts kept him up.

Which, when Tony woke up whining in pain and muttering Peter’s name in the middle of the night, he was glad he wasn’t sleeping very hard.

“Hey, Tony, I’m right here,” he said softly as he got up to soothe him, wincing a little at how sweaty and pale Tony was. “Darling, hey, talk to me. What’s going on?” he cooed, cupping Tony’s cheek gently.

“Pete?” Tony muttered, voice filled with pain as he opened his eyes to stare up at him, unable to hold back a soft moan as the bed shifted when Peter sat on it. 

“Are you okay? Did the morphine drip stop working again?” Peter asked softly, looking over to see the IV still dripping and connected. 

“No. No, I’m fine, Pete, sorry I woke you up,” Tony said - but his voice was tight with pain and, Peter now noticed, he was shaking. 

“Tony,” Peter sighed heavily. “I’m going to go get a nurse. You’re burning up,” he said before he got up to find someone. 

Peter managed to find one of the nurses he recognized from the night staff to come check Tony out. Curious and worried, Peter watched as she carefully removed some of the dressings to check on the wounds and Peter couldn’t help but wince and press a hand over his mouth to suppress a gag when one of the deeper burns looked discolored and was oozing pus. 

How the nurses could be face to face with something like that and not vomit was beyond Peter because he had to quickly move around to Tony’s good side and take a few deep breaths to keep his dinner down. Then again, the morning sickness hadn’t completely gone away yet so maybe he’d do better if he wasn’t pregnant.

Instead, she hummed softly and shook her head. “Let’s get this cleaned up and I’ll get our on-call doctor in here to look at it,” she said, gently removing the rest of the gauze to throw away before changing out gloves and gathering what she’d need to clean the wound. 

Peter just stayed by Tony, holding his hand and trying to distract him from what the nurse was doing because it definitely didn’t look like it would feel great and by Tony’s wincing and pained grunts, he was right. So he just babbled about his shopping trip and talked about how they could find out if the baby was a boy or a girl with the next ultrasound in a few weeks until the nurse was done.

It ended up being a long night. They hung up another bag of antibiotics - apparently, a heavier one - and with it gave Tony an anti-nausea but they couldn’t increase the pain medication anymore. Which meant Tony was miserable for the rest of the night. Unfortunately, the antibiotics didn’t seem to be doing anything, either. Watching how quickly Tony went from fully lucid and awake most of the time to slurring his words and barely being able to keep his eyes open for more than a few seconds at a time was terrifying for Peter and he wouldn’t have been able to sleep even if he tried.

It was like watching him snap but in slow motion.


	6. Oh I've felt that fire and I, I've been burned

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Very very slight mentions of suicidal thoughts in a flashback.
> 
> Be prepared for some more angst, y'all. 
> 
> And, as always, comments are much appreciated and thank you to everyone that's been commenting and supporting this!!! <3 I love you all. And please, please if you like the story leave even a short comment!! Tell me your favorite scenes, and I'm even open to future scene ideas if anyone has any - I can't promise I'll be able to fit every one of them in but I'll do my best.
> 
> (Also this is totally not medically correct at all so I apologize in advance.)

Honestly, Peter was amazed by how well he managed to keep himself together in the early hours of the morning. Settled onto the edge of Tony’s bed, brushing his hair back and just talking softly to him. No matter if he was semi-conscious or completely unresponsive. It had to be some sort of miracle that his voice never shook or cracked even as silent tears spilled over his cheeks. 

All of that went out the window when Happy walked in.

“Hey, kid, did you still want to - Oh,” Happy paused, halfway through the doorway. Peter sniffling softly and not looking at Happy at first.

“H-He um… T-There’s an infection s-so -” Peter’s sentence was interrupted by a soft, hiccuped sob that had him pressing the sleeve of the big sweater over his mouth to try and suppress more embarrassing noises like that from happening. 

Not that it mattered when Happy came around to rub a hand soothingly between his shoulder blades. It was like some switch clicking and everything came crashing down on Peter again as the realization hit him like a punch to the gut -

Tony could still die. 

He’d been doing so well. Peter forgot that there was still such a big possibility of things going south like this. 

Peter wasn’t sure how he ended up clinging so tightly onto the suit Happy wore, face buried against his chest and hiccuping painfully. 

“He’ll be okay, Pete. You gotta believe that,” Happy said. “He’s gonna pull through. You and I both know how stubborn Tony is and he's got too much to live for to give up."

"Yeah," Peter sniffled, pulling away finally and grabbing a few tissues when Happy offered him the box.

\---

_"W-wait… what-what do you mean you don't know? You can't… not know. I-I need to know," Peter said between soft sobs, absolutely shaking even as Pepper draped a blanket over his shoulders. _

_"I'm sorry, Peter, I really am," Steve said gently, sitting beside the younger man and resting a hand on his shoulder. "There's just… no way to make contact with him on Titan. We'll just have to wait to see if he comes back."_

_Peter couldn't respond, curling in on himself and burying his face against his knees, leaning against Steve's side when he wrapped an arm around him. Pepper settled in on his other side to smooth his hair down and, her own voice unsteady and thick with tears reassured him that he wouldn't be alone. _

_It didn't make the painfully empty feeling in his chest any better nor did it stop the tears and painful sobs ripped from his throat. Peter wasn't even sure how he'd be able to live when everyone he loved was so suddenly ripped away from him. He had no family. No friends. And the love of his life may or may not be alive - no one knew._

_If it weren't for the remaining Avengers, Happy, and Pepper being there to help piece him back together Peter wasn't sure he would have survived the heartbreak. _

\---

"Hey, sweetie."

May's voice, soft and soothing, surprised Peter a little. She hasn't come into Tony's room once. But there she was with a Tupperware of food and a sympathetic, sad smile. "How're you holding up?" She asked, coming around and pulling a chair up a little closer to the bed.

Peter hasn't moved from the spot near the head of Tony's bed except to use the bathroom a few times despite everyone's concerns. Even Tony's doctor telling him he should eat and rest. He's barely slept in the last 48 hours and a headache was starting to build which the pain didn't help the emotional distress either.

"Um… do you want me to be honest?" Peter asked brokenly.

May frowned, reaching out to put a hand on Peter's knee. "I'm sorry, baby. I brought you some food. Happy told me you haven't eaten anything since yesterday afternoon. I made your favorite - shepherd's pie," she said, holding out the container of food towards him. 

"No thanks," Peter said, sniffling softly and rubbing away the stray tears that just wouldn't stop coming. 

"Honey, you have to eat. If not for yourself then for your baby," May told him. "Gotta stay strong and make sure my grandbaby comes out healthy."

"Thought you didn't want a grandbaby," Peter said, reluctantly taking the container and fork that was handed over to him. 

"I told you to give me a few days to come to terms with it. Like I said I had a hard time remembering that you're a full-fledged adult now and not some star-struck, overly excitable 20 year old that - honestly - I still saw as my little awkward 15-year-old Peter. And Happy's been talking to me a lot. Told me how well Tony's been taking care of you. How much he really, truly loves you and I don't know… the idea of having a cute little mini-Peter around is something I can definitely look forward to," May said. 

Peter couldn't help a small smile at that, at least May had come around. It took just a tiny bit of stress off of him but that tiny bit made breathing a little easier. 

"'m finding out what the baby is in a few weeks at my 16-week scan. Or, at least they said they'd try to," Peter told May, picking at the food and managing to eat a few bites.

"How far along are you again?" May asked.

"12 weeks, 5 days," Peter answered around a mouthful of food. "You can't really tell in this sweater but I've already started showing a little," Peter said, smoothing the sweater down so May could see the forming bump.

“You ever thought about doing like… week by week pictures?” May asked. “Everyone seems to be doing them now and it might be something cute you and Tony can look back on later.”

Peter shrugged. “Haven’t thought about it but… maybe,” he said, looking down at Tony. If he made it through this, Peter was sure he’d be thrilled to have those. Of course they’re starting a little late but better late than never. And MJ had a nice camera. “Y’know, I think I will. Tony would like it.” 

“Yeah. We can make a little scrapbook or uh… baby book, I guess. With the pregnancy pictures and then all the other little stuff that would go in a baby book,” May said.

“What does even go in a baby book?” Peter asked, taking one last bite of food before putting the lid back on the container and setting it on the bedside table - he was starting to feel nauseous. 

May hesitated, a thoughtful look coming over her face before she shook her head and shrugged. “I have no idea,” she laughed. 

As stressed and tired as Peter was, he couldn’t help a soft laugh, either.

\---

_”I know what you’re all doing,” Peter said one afternoon when, after excusing himself from dinner early, Steve walked into the lab. “How at least one other person just so happens to be in the same room as me at all times. You’ve got me on suicide watch,” he said bitterly. _

_“Pete, we-”_

_“I know,” Peter said shortly, cutting him off. “You care about me. And I’m fine. Well. I’m not. But I’m not going to… Tony might still be out there, right? And as long as that’s still a possibility I’m not going to… do that.” _

_Steve sighed heavily, sitting down next to Peter and patting his shoulder firmly. “Look, Peter, we’re all in the same boat here. Just trying to get by, alright? And we want you to know that we’re here for you anytime you need to talk. Every single one of us lost someone we care about. None of us misfits have a family but we’ve got each other as stupidly cheesy as that sounds. And we don’t want to lose you, too. Even if Tony doesn’t come back. You have people here that care deeply about you and would be devastated to lose you.” _

_"I know," Peter said softly. "Still doesn't make losing everyone else any less painful." _

\---

A medically induced coma.

They were putting Tony in a coma.

Three weeks of unsuccessfully fighting a raging infection and while it didn’t get worse during that time it didn’t get better either.

Now it was getting worse and the doctors said this would be his best chance. 

That didn’t make Peter feel any better about signing the paperwork for it, though. Pepper reassuring him that it was for the best the whole time and holding him tightly as the doctor hooked up the IV. It wasn’t like Tony was conscious anyways, but Peter still couldn’t bear to watch. Instead buried his face against Pepper’s shoulders sniffling softly and his whole body shaking in an effort not to start sobbing again.

Honestly, it was a wonder that Peter even had anymore tears to cry. They’ve been coming nearly non-stop lately.

It was like the first few days in the hospital all over again. People were in and out. Pepper stayed most of the time. Everyone fussed over Peter and brought a lot of food but Peter could barely force himself to eat a few bites of anything before feeling like he was going to puke. Everyone encouraged him to just try to eat throughout the day - even the nurses would check in with water and remind him to eat. Or, on the days that the nausea was really bad they’d bring him protein shakes and saltines. 

Even so, he felt like his stomach got bigger every day and, with help from MJ and some of the nurses to find a good spot to do it, he managed to start the week-by-week picture diary thing that May suggested. 

When no one was around he’d sit on Tony’s bed and talk to him. Tell him about what happened that day - who visited, how everyone missed him and wanted him to pull through - Peter wasn’t sure if Tony heard any of it but it made him feel better. 

Before Peter knew it, his appointment came up and it was the first time he’d left the hospital since they put Tony into a coma - the nurses were kind enough to let him use the shower in the attached bathroom and Pepper, Steve, or Happy would bring him clothes. Despite having actual maternity clothes, Peter just went back to wearing oversized sweaters and leggings again. Now, though, his stomach was obvious even when he wore those sweaters. His bump disrupting the way they laid and even people he didn’t tell would know just by looking at him. 

May, Ned, and MJ all came back into the ultrasound room with him after Peter’s initial exam but he couldn’t help the hollow feeling in his chest that someone was missing - because there was. 

The tears were an immediate reaction when his midwife announced that he was having a boy and he was still sniffling as he wiped off the gel from his stomach and - Ned and MJ’s arms wrapped around him on either side - walked out to the waiting room…

And everyone was there.

Steve, Rhodey, Pepper, Happy, Bucky, Sam, even Bruce - arm in a sling, still - waiting expectantly.

“Well…?” Steve prompted. “We having a boy or girl?”

“We…?”

“Pete, we’re all in this together. You’re never going to have to be alone - even if Tony doesn’t make it. Which he will. But… point is, we’re all family and we’re all here for you,” Happy said. 

Peter, through his tears, couldn’t help the smile that broke out on his face. “The baby’s a boy,” he said, face flushing even as he laughed when the room erupted into cheers and ‘I told you so’s. Immediately there was an argument about who would get what for the kid and how they were going to decorate the baby’s room. Steve promised he’d sketch a few things out and get Peter’s approval before they actually started remodeling, though. 

And, again, Peter could breathe a little easier at least for the time being.


	7. A halo of patience and a less sporadic pace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y'all! Sorry for how long it took between chapters. Kinda failed at NANO but I'm not giving up on this! 
> 
> Anyways, enjoy!!! <3 <3 
> 
> (Also comments fuel my desire to write so please spare a moment and leave even a short comment!!)
> 
> Also just a note I thought of in the flashback with Peter in the beginning of his relationship w Tony he is 18. I call him a teenager once but he is perfectly legal.

The infection finally - thankfully - was starting to get better. Fever going down and burns starting to actually heal which meant they were making plans to bring Tony out of the coma and hopefully the burns would continue to heal like they had been. If they did it would probably only be another week or two before they put him in a normal room. 

Peter just hoped that Tony could come home before their baby was born. That was the one thing that Peter desperately wanted Tony there for. Of course, he knew that he could ask anyone - Steve, Happy, May, his friends, Pepper - to be his support (birthing partner? Peter was sure that was a phrase he’s heard before) and they’d say yes in a heartbeat. But just the thought of Tony not being there when their son is born and not being one of the first people to hold him made Peter want to cry. 

Maybe, just maybe the realization of that possibility did make him cry a little. 

“Pete? Are you okay? Did something happen?”

Peter jumped slightly at the sound of Steve’s voice, “U-Um…” he sniffled, quickly wiping his tears away. “No - Nothing happened - I’m fine just… um…” he hesitated, not even sure how to word what was going through his mind without crying even more. “Pregnancy hormones?” he ended up saying. “Tony’s actually doing a lot better. They’re gonna start bringing him out of the coma soon. Probably tomorrow.”

“Oh, that’s great!” Steve smiled, sitting next to Peter.

“Yeah,” Peter said, managing a smile back at Steve. “What’s that?” he asked, gesturing to the sketchbook Steve had clutched in his hands. 

“Well… we’ve all been talking and collaborating and I brought some sketches - ideas for the baby’s room,” Steve told him, flipping open the sketchbook.

“Collaborating or arguing?” Peter teased, leaning over to look at the options they came up with. 

“Both,” Steve laughed before flipping through the different layouts and designs that they’d thought up. “I, personally, like this one the best with the baby’s crib against this wall here and the dresser in the corner. Then you can just glance in and see him.”

“Yeah… I think I like that one also,” Peter said. “But what about -” he cut himself off, looking down at his stomach when he felt the baby move. A clear, defined kick. Not just… fluttering that Peter honestly couldn’t be sure was even the baby moving. 

“Hey, what’s going on?” Steve asked, “You’re worrying me again.”

“Huh? Oh no - it’s - the baby just moved. Like… actually kicked. He’s still - You might be able to feel it if… Do you want to?” Peter asked in a rush of words.

“Sure, why not?” Steve chuckled, letting Peter guide his hand to where the baby was kicking against. “Oh my God, Peter, that’s amazing,” Steve breathed. 

“You can feel it?” Peter grinned. 

Steve nodded. “That’ll be a nice surprise for Tony when he wakes up,” he chuckled, letting his hand linger for just another few seconds while the baby was still moving. 

“Yeah,” Peter said. 

Steve stuck around for a little longer to talk about what colors he’d want for the baby’s room and if they’d want anything extra in there - rocking chair, changing table - before he left with a promise to send pictures of what they get at the store.

Once Peter was alone he crawled onto Tony’s bed - careful like always when he’d sit there and talk to him. Peter fully realized how ridiculous everyone else would think he was and yeah, maybe he was being ridiculous but it made him feel better. So he knelt on the bed and gently grabbed Tony’s hand to press against his stomach when the baby started to noticeably move again. “Our baby’s kicking. I can feel it now - Steve was able to earlier. I hope you can. Wish you could’ve been the first one - besides me, of course - to feel it. That’s just kinda a dad’s right, isn’t it? Should’ve been there at the ultrasound with me, too. I already told you we’re having a boy and I think I already know what I want to name him - if you’re okay with it. I just keep thinking Benjamin Anthony would be perfect. I think he should have your name,” Peter sighed, keeping Tony’s hand pressed against his stomach. “God, I miss you. The doctors are talking about bringing you out of the coma, though. Hopefully, they’ll be able to tomorrow.”

\---

_Peter idly picked at the sandwich that Natasha had made him - not eating it but pulling it into pieces. He fully realized that he was acting like a child but he didn’t want to eat. Eating made him feel nauseous. _

_With some goading, he took a few bites before he couldn’t anymore. Feeling like he’d puke if he tried. “Thanks, Nat, I appreciate it. I just… can’t,” he sighed as he threw the rest away and put the plate in the sink. _

_“At least you ate some of it,” Natasha shrugged. “Y’know maybe you should consider going to one of those groups. I think Steve is starting one,” she said gently. “I think it would be good if you left the base once in a while.”_

_Peter couldn’t help a scowl at that idea. About to say something when a loud noise came from outside, he and Natasha shared a confused look before Peter went to look out the window and… there was a ship?_

_He tried not to get his hopes up but at the same time he couldn’t help himself from dashing outside as the ship opened and Peter had to blink hard a few times to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating because that was Tony stepping out._

_Skinny and supported by someone Peter didn’t know but… Alive. _

_“Oh my God,” Peter whispered, tears quickly welling up as Steve rushed to help Tony. _

_Peter met them halfway and replaced the lady on the other side of Tony - wrapping an arm around Tony’s too-small waist. He was all skin and bones and Peter could feel every bone pressed against his side. _

_“Pete, thank god,” Tony sighed, sounding just as relieved as Peter felt. “I didn’t know if you… Fuck, I’m glad you’re still here.”_

_“Yeah, me too,” Peter replied, pressing a kiss against Tony’s cheek. _

_For the first time since everyone dusted, Peter was glad he hadn’t.  
_

\---

Finally, after weeks of tears and worrying, they were starting to ease Tony out of the coma. It was a surprisingly long process. Peter was the only one allowed in to visit while Tony was waking up to avoid overwhelming him. And he still wasn’t completely with it when he first woke up. Barely able to talk, very confused, and didn’t seem to register that Peter was there.

It was heartbreaking, but at least he was waking up. 

He became more conscious and aware throughout the day. He was able to respond and talk and ask questions and understand the answers to those questions - even if he didn’t remember them.

“How long was I out?” Tony asked Peter, voice hoarse and barely managing anything above a whisper. “You’ve gotten so big.”

“Yeah, that definitely helps the self-confidence,” Peter teased with a soft chuckle. "I’m 18 weeks along now,” he told Tony gently. “The baby’s kicking. Do you want to feel him?” 

“Him…?”

“Yeah, darling, we’re having a boy,” Peter reminded him - it was probably the third time he’s told Tony since he woke up. “Give me your hand,” he said, though Tony was barely able to raise it - Peter grabbed his wrist to press his hand against his stomach. “Can you feel him moving?”

“Wow,” Tony breathed which was enough of an answer for Peter since it was probably the best he’d get at this moment. 

“Yeah, he’s been kicking like that for a few days now. Or, rather, I’ve been able to feel it for a few days. I’m sure he’s been moving and kicking for-” Peter cut himself off when he saw that Tony had fallen asleep. Sighing softly, Peter laid Tony’s hand gently back on the bed and sat back down.

Tony probably wouldn’t remember any of that.

Oh well. Peter was just happy he was starting to do better.

They had that exact same conversation two more times before Tony was able to grasp onto the information and remember it. At least he remembered everything that happened before being put under so they didn’t have to explain that again. He remembered that Peter was pregnant, that he'd lost an arm, and that they defeated Thanos.

\---

_Upon realizing that Tony was taking him to the Avengers Tower and not his dorm room, Peter’s heart promptly started beating about three times it’s normal pace. He tried not to show it, though. Anyways, it’s what he expected so he wasn’t even sure why he was getting so nervous. _

_Despite being a hero, Tony Stark was still a playboy. Peter had been (or at least he thought he had been) fully prepared for a dinner, finally losing his virginity, and then taken home the next morning and probably never seeing Tony again. It hurt a little. Peter genuinely liked him. But that was what Tony Stark was best at._

_“You okay?”_

_Peter snapped his head around to look at Tony, wide-eyed and feeling a blush creeping up to his face. “U-Um… Yeah. Yeah. Totally, what - why do you ask?”_

_“Your bouncing your leg so hard I swear the car is jiggling,” Tony snorted. “I can take you back to your dorm, if you’d like.”_

_“No!” Peter blurted, maybe a little too quickly. _

_“Okay,” Tony laughed. _

_That’s how Peter ended up, while watching a movie, in Tony’s lap - tongues tied together and panting for breath every time they parted. Now that he’s had time to reign in the anxieties, Peter was determined to impress. Or… at least try to. But he’s done this before. Making out. Heavy petting. Over-the-clothes grinding. _

_Peter let his head fall back when Tony started to kiss at his neck, letting out a breathy moan when the older man nipped at his skin. _

_“Fuck, didn’t think I’d get this lucky on a first date,” Tony muttered against Peter’s neck, a hand sliding underneath his shirt to touch the bare skin of his low back. _

_...Had he been planning on more? Peter paused and frowned slightly before Tony started doing those delicious things to his neck again and that same hand slid downwards - under the waistband of his jeans to grab a handful of his ass. _

_And there his heart went again. Jumping into his throat and pounding against his chest and he blurted out something he had never planned on telling Tony._

_“H-Hey um… I-I haven’t… y’know… with a guy before,” Peter panted softly, Tony pulling back to look up at him._

_“Do you want to stop? We can if-”_

_“No,” Peter cut him off. “No, I-I don’t. Just… um… go slow?”_

_“I can do that,” Tony said, pausing for a moment and humming thoughtfully. “You’ve been with girls before, though? Because I’m not above bottoming once in a while.”_

_Peter’s eyes went wide just at the thought of fucking Tony freaking Stark. That was an image that would be hard to get out of his head. The more pressing issue, though, was that he hasn’t been with a girl either and he’d probably fail miserably. “U-Uh…” Peter hesitated, face burning red. He dropped his forehead against Tony’s shoulder so he wouldn’t have to look at him. “No,” he squeaked out._

_Tony went back to stroking up and down his spine, chuckling soft and deep. “Okay. If that’s the case then how about we leave it here tonight and uh… See how things go.”_

_Peter couldn’t help a soft groan of disappointment. “No - No, I want to, though. Just… I - Please don’t take this the wrong way but… will I see you again?” Peter asked softly, face still buried against Tony’s shoulder._

_“Sweetheart, what do you think this was?” Tony scoffed. _

_“I-I mean… you kind of have a reputation,” Peter finally leaned back to actually look at Tony and hated himself for the flash of hurt that came over his face._

_“Yeah," Tony sighed softly. "And I want to end that. With you - if you want. Honey, you’re the first person I’ve found - besides Banner - that can keep up with all my rambling about tech and engineering and physics. You’re special. And I want to hold onto that as long as I can,” Tony told him with nothing but sincerity in his voice._

_Peter just stared at him, trying to fully comprehend what Tony was saying. “Uh… I-I um… yes. Yes. I want that more than anything,” he breathed._

_Tony smiled up at him and something in the way he was looking at Peter made the teen’s stomach fill with butterflies. “Wanna see my lab, then? I can show you a few things I’ve been working on.”_

_“Hell yeah,” Peter grinned._


	8. Fortune teller that says maybe you will go to hell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!!! So there's more Tony and Peter stuff here. Things are looking up lol.
> 
> Anyways, thank you all for your comments and please leave one if you like the story!!! Even a short comment is much appreciated! It fuels my drive to write lol.

“I’m never going to get used to that,” Tony breathed, hand pressed against Peter’s stomach while the baby was being restless. 

Within two weeks Tony had returned to being just as lucid and conscious as before the infection hit. Within those same two weeks, the kicks and movement Peter felt became more and more defined. Now he could tell if the baby was rolling, stretching, or actually kicking. Sometimes they could even see him moving. 

And, as expected, Tony couldn’t keep his hand off of Peter’s stomach. 

“I don’t think I will, either,” Peter admitted, sitting on Tony’s bed - shirt pulled up to his chest at Tony’s request.

“Thought of any names while I was out?” Tony asked, a grin spreading over his face when the baby decided to stretch and he could actually see the movement under Peter’s skin. 

“Yeah, um… I was thinking Benjamin Anthony,” Peter said. “Unless you had a better idea.”

“Anthony? You really want to name our kid after _me_? Baby, you’re doing all the hard work, here. Don’t give me so much credit,” Tony teased.

“It’d be his middle name. And, darling, you saved the world. More than once,” Peter replied, reaching out to cup Tony’s face and softly run a thumb over his cheek. “So yes. I want him to have your name. If you’re really against it we can figure something else out, though."

“No. If that’s what you want, that’s what we’ll do. I’m just surprised,” Tony chuckled. 

"Well that's what I want," Peter grinned, leaning down to kiss Tony softly. 

Peter pretty much melted when Tony ran a hand through his hair and deepened the kiss. It wasn't until now that Peter realized just how much he missed this - the closeness and intimacy of just kissing soft and slow. They hadn't done anything more than a peck here or there with Tony recovering. So, upon hearing a soft, polite cough, Peter couldn’t help but let out a disappointed sigh as he pulled away and turned to look at Pepper, adjusting his shirt as he sat upright again. 

"Sorry to interrupt," Pepper said, about to speak again when Tony cut her off.

"Are you sorry? Really?” Tony said skeptically.

"No,” she said with a little smile before setting her gaze on Peter. “I was heading up and bumped into your friends," Pepper told him. “They’re waiting outside with something for you.”

"They never told me they were stopping by," Peter said, frowning as he grabbed his phone to look through his recent texts. 

"Just go talk to them, sweetheart. Hang out for a little while. It’s not like I’m going anywhere,” Tony said.

“Fine,” Peter huffed before leaning in for one last little kiss. Peter figured maybe MJ or Ned found something cute for the baby but he didn't expect to walk out to the waiting room - followed shortly by Pepper - and find not just Ned and MJ but also Steve, Bucky, Sam, Bruce, Rhodey, Happy and May waiting. Not to mention the balloons and wrapped boxes and cupcakes spread out. 

"Happy birthday!" MJ and Ned cheered in unison, followed shortly by everyone else.

Peter just stared blankly. "I um… it's not… my birthday?" He squeaked out. 

"Uh… yeah, it is," MJ laughed. 

"No, my birthday's not until… um…" Peter frowned, looking down at his phone for the date and realizing, in shock, that it was his birthday. Huh. "Oh shit."

The room erupted with laughter and Peter was more than certain they'd all be kicked out if the majority of people here weren't part of the Avengers. As it was, Peter joined in and sat down with them. 

He was a little sad that Tony couldn't be there but there was no way everyone would either fit or even be allowed back there. They took turns visiting, though and Peter showed off the couple of baby things he was gifted. 

Once everyone left - with a lot of hugs and a promise to Ned, MJ, and May that he’d see them more now that Tony was doing better - Peter was more than content to sit quietly with Tony. Sharing soft kisses and talking about their impending parenthood.

\---

_ “Happy birthday, baby boy,” Tony drawled, lounging naked against the pillows on their bed by the time Peter got out of his shower. That, by itself, was enough to make the younger man stop and take attention but then Tony was handing him the bottle of lube and a condom with a coy smile. “I know you’ve been wanting to, sweetheart.”_

_And that… well that was definitely more than Peter was hoping for - which was some hot, rough birthday sex that would leave him sore and bruised in the morning. _

_What he got was…_

_So much better._

_“Yeah,” Peter breathed, head swimming because he was pretty sure all of the blood supply that was supposed to go to his brain just started heading south instead when Tony leaned back against the headboard, legs spread in invitation. _

_“Well, baby? You gonna just stare at me all night or are you going to come over here and fuck me?”_

_“Can’t I do both?” Peter muttered. He easily let the towel fall off from around his waist as he crawled onto the bed to fit himself between Tony’s legs. _

\---

The day that the doctors declared Tony was in the clear and moved him out of the ICU to a normal recovery room was probably one of the best days of Peter’s life. He was sure that would soon be trumped by Tony being fully released from the hospital and then when their son is born but… For now.

The bed was bigger and Tony didn’t have the IV’s anymore now that he was able to eat and drink on his own and they switched him over to painkillers and antibiotics in the form of pills which meant Peter was able to be closer. They could cuddle while they talked - so long as he was careful. The burns were healing nicely but still tender to the touch.

On this floor, though, they wouldn’t let Peter spend the night. They let him stay longer than most people and the nurses were just as sweet but when it hit about 10PM they were escorting him out. As much as Peter hated it, he didn’t try to fight it. Anyways, sleeping in his own bed - while lonely - did help with the constant backache he’s had for weeks thanks to a combination of sleeping in a chair and being - now 6 months - pregnant. 

And… he might be working on a little project for Tony. Designing a prosthetic arm for him - with Bucky and Dr. Banner’s help of course. The hospital would be fitting him for one soon but whatever they got him wouldn’t be anything near as good as what they were putting together.

Peter stayed up late to finish but it was well worth being so exhausted because he got to see the look on Tony’s face when he opened up the case they’d put it in the next morning. Bucky and Dr. Banner standing alongside him - Peter had insisted they come with him since they had helped so much.

“Holy shit…” Tony breathed, trailing his fingers over the red and gold finish. “Thought I was going to have to design one myself but this is… amazing,” Tony muttered as he examined it. 

“T’Challa gave us the vibranium we’d need as a thank you gift and Dr. Banner and Bucky helped out a lot,” Peter told Tony, grinning ear-to-ear. 

“Oh, I was just the model," Bucky chuckled.

“Peter did most of it, don’t let him fool you,” Bruce said adamantly. “Sketched it out, came up with the programming. I just helped with the execution.”

"Oh, I believe it. Peter’s brilliant," Tony said, looking up at Peter with a soft smile and the most adoring, loving look on his face that it made Peter want to cry. "Sometimes I worry that he might be smarter than me," Tony teased softly. 

"That's a lie," Peter scoffed, "So you like it?"

"Oh, sweetheart, I love it," Tony grinned. "C’mere I wanna kiss you," Tony reached his hand out to pull Peter closer and kiss him softly - also gently wiping away a few tears that Peter hadn’t even realized had fallen. "Sorry, fellas, Peter's the only one getting kisses from me," he teased when they parted.

"That's fine, I don't think Steve would be thrilled if I started kissing other guys," Bucky chuckled. 

"Pardon?” Tony squeaked, “You and… Hold on, did I hear that right? You’re - How much did I miss? I didn’t even… Steve’s gay?”

"He is for me, at least," Bucky shrugged, an amused smile on his face. "Prefers the term 'pansexual', though," Bucky said.

“Did you know?” Tony asked, a hint of accusation in his tone as he looked up at Peter. 

“Well, yeah. I meant to tell you just… forgot?” Peter shrugged. “Didn’t seem important with everything else happening.”

Tony took in a deep breath and shook his head at Peter. “Sorry, just… give me a minute here. Pansexual? I’m pretty sure that word didn’t even _exist_ in his time. Where’d he learn that?”

“I’m also from that era, Tony. Just because we grew up in the ‘20s doesn’t mean we can’t learn new things,” Bucky reminded him. “And Peter helped a little.”

“Right, of course. Anything else you guys failed to clue me in on?” Tony asked, looking between the three of them. “No? That’s it? Good.” Tony hummed thoughtfully for a moment, “Say uh… I gotta know - who’s the bottom? Because I feel like it’s gotta be Cap, right? With an ass like that, I mean…”

“I really didn’t need to think about that,” Bruce said with an exasperated sigh. “I’ll visit later, Tony. Glad you like the arm,” he said before leaving.

“Oh c’mon. I can’t be the only one wondering,” Tony said, looking up at Peter.

“I think you are, darling,” Peter said dryly, clicking closed the case the prosthetic was in and setting it to the side for now. 

At least Bucky didn’t seem offended - more amused than anything. "Ask Steve if you really want to know," he said with a laugh. “And with that, I’ll leave you guys alone. Congratulations, by the way,” Bucky gestured towards Peter’s stomach before he left.

\---

_Peter had to say he was more than a little surprised when he found Steve sitting on the pier at quarter after 2AM. It was usually Peter’s spot when he couldn’t sleep and didn’t want to tinker around in the lab. The water was quiet and soothing and it helped calm the racing thoughts in his head._

_Usually, no one else was out there. “Hey,” Peter greeted softly, sitting next to the older man when Steve scooted over._

_“You can’t sleep either, huh?” Steve sighed, managing a half-smile at Peter. _

_“Yeah, I’ve been having a lot of trouble sleeping lately,” Peter commented. “I come out here a lot… Usually, no one else is on the pier.” _

_Steve hummed thoughtfully and shrugged. “Seems like a good place to work out some thoughts and feelings.”_

_Peter pulled his legs up onto the bench, hugging his knees to his chest as he stared out at the water - not saying anything else at first before he just had to ask. “Who’re you thinking about?”_

_The way Steve’s breath caught in his throat and how he tensed up made Peter almost take back the question but then Steve let out a defeated sigh and, not looking at Peter, said, “Bucky.”_

_“Oh. Guess I should’ve known that. You guys grew up together, right?” Peter asked softly. He didn’t know too much about their relationship - he’s only met Bucky maybe once but Steve’s talked about him once in a while. _

_“Yeah, we did. It was um… During that time, y’know, things like two guys being together didn’t… happen. Or, well, it was hidden and a lot of people thought it was wrong. It’s so different now. Kind of hard to adjust,” Steve said._

_“Oh,” Peter muttered, leaning away from Steve a little. He always seemed supportive but now Peter was wondering if his relationship with Tony has been making Steve uncomfortable. Maybe he’d just been putting up a front. Steve’s been one of Peter’s main supports through this so the thought of him being uncomfortable around Peter filled him with a nauseating amount of dread. At least until Steve started talking again._

_“Bucky um… He came out to me just before the fight with Thanos. He kissed me. Said he just wanted to know what it was like in case one of us didn’t make it out alive,” Steve buried his face against his hands and let out a frustrated sigh. “I didn’t react… I couldn’t. I just told him to show up for the fight and left. I never thought of him like that before, at least I told myself I didn’t. I just can’t stop thinking about it - about him. But he’s… gone now.”_

_Peter frowned sympathetically, reaching out to put a hand on Steve’s shoulder. He had no idea what to say but hoped the touch would offer some sort of comfort. At least, if Tony hadn’t made it, he knew how much Peter cared about him. Peter could only imagine the amount of guilt and regret that would plague him if he’d been in a similar situation._


	9. Thinking bliss is on the other side of this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! It's been a while since the last update and my lovely commenter Marisa has been helping me out a lot with this story!!! 
> 
> It's not a long chapter by any means but it's fluffy and cute and pretty much all just about Tony and Peter's relationship.
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy!!!! <3 <3 <3 
> 
> Please leave a comment if you liked it or had any suggestions for future chapters! Your comments fuel my desire to write and I appreciate each and every one of them! <3 <3

“This really is amazing, Peter,” Tony said after they had attached the prosthetic.

Peter grinned at the praise. “Yeah, and it’ll get easier to use as time goes on. Eventually, it should be just like having your arm… except cooler,” he said.

Tony couldn’t help but laugh at that. “Yeah because that’s what I was really going for. A cool arm.”

“Well you’re welcome,” Peter chuckled, moving to sit on the bed with Tony, reaching out to run a hand over the vibranium. “Let’s try moving it. Something small um… Here,” Peter put his hand in the palm of Tony’s prosthetic, “Squeeze my hand.”

It took a minute and some concentration but eventually Tony was able to get the fingers to twitch and slowly close around Peter’s. A little awkward and he couldn’t get the individual fingers to move - yet - but he was able to move it. “Yeah, that’ll take some getting used to,” Tony said.

“Well duh. I never said that the second we attach it you’ll be able to fully control the thing,” Peter teased, rubbing a thumb over the vibranium fingers. “Kinda sexy seeing it on you, y’know.”

“Sexy? Really? You think Bucky’s arm is sexy, too, baby?” Tony asked with a little smirk.

“I never said that,” Peter argued, though he could feel his face heating up a little. “And didn’t you just say the other day that you’ve checked out Cap’s ass? I think I remember that happening.”

“Well you got me there,” Tony admitted with a half shrug. “I still like your ass much better, though.” 

“Yeah, and I like your arm better.”

“That’s just because you made it,” Tony quipped back. 

“Nuh-uh. It’s because it’s attached to the man I love,” Peter said softly, leaning over to kiss Tony. “And you are much sexier than Bucky. At least to me.”

“Even with all the scars…?” Tony muttered, bringing his good hand up to run through Peter’s hair - keeping him close. “They’re always going to be there, you know. Burns that severe don’t just vanish without leaving a mark.”

“_Especially_ with all the scars,” Peter assured, kissing Tony again. Soft and sure and sighing into it when Tony kissed back a little firmer. 

Peter had to hold back a groan when they were interrupted by a knock on the door. Glancing at the time, he realized it was probably Tony’s physical therapy as Tony called out for them to come in.

Honestly, at this point, Peter would kill for just 30 minutes of time alone with Tony without someone - Pepper, one of the Avengers, a nurse, PT - interrupting.

\---

_The way that Tony would occasionally look at him - all wide-eyed and in awe, as if he could hardly believe that Peter was even real - always made Peter feel like his insides were melting in the best way possible. Usually, it happened while they were talking shop if Peter got passionate about something._

_It was during one of his frenzied rants about the theoretical possibility of a Multiverse existing that he earned another one of those looks._

_Tony staring at him like he hung the moon. Adoration and wonder clear in his expression as he listened to Peter’s ramblings. _

_It made the young man falter a little at the intensity of the stare. It was hard enough getting used to being able to nerd out and go on rants and ramble about these things without having to reign himself in because Tony knew exactly what he was talking about and didn’t make fun of him for it. For someone to look at him like that, with such love and tenderness, just because he was being a nerd well… sometimes Peter felt like his heart would just stop beating. Or, alternatively, beat right out of his chest._

_“W-What?” Peter asked, feeling his face turn red when Tony’s gaze didn’t break._

_“I love you.”_

_“U-um…” Peter squeaked, eyes going wide and his heart jumping into his throat. Not that he didn’t feel the same way. Those words have been on the tip of his tongue for _months_ now. He was just terrified that Tony might not feel the same way. Or that he was going to fast or that it just wouldn’t be the right timing. “Yeah.”_

_“Yeah…?” Tony echoed. “That’s - Pete, babe, it’s fine if you don’t want to say it back but really? I tell you I love you and all you have to say is ‘yeah’?” he chuckled, mostly teasing but Peter picked up on the nervous tone and the way Tony tapped his fingers anxiously against his thigh. _

_“No. I-I mean… I - that’s - Holy shit,” Peter breathed. “I just didn’t expect - so soon - and - uh.”_

_“It’s okay, Pete, just forget about it,” Tony said but the look on his face and tone of his voice said it was very much not okay and Peter’s heart ached to make it right but he just couldn’t get his brain to cooperate to make the words he wanted to say come out of his mouth._

_So, instead, Peter scrambled into Tony’s lap and lurched forward to kiss him. Quick, frenzied, maybe a little too hard. Peter just hoped it got the sentiment across. By the way Tony’s hands gripped his hips and how the older man kissed back, Peter was hoping it worked. “Of course I love you back,” Peter muttered in a rush of breath after pulling away just enough to talk. “‘M just…. Kind of an idiot,” he chuckled._

_“Yeah,” Tony said with a little smirk up at him._

_Peter’s eyes widened momentarily at the jab before he grabbed one of the decorative pillows off the couch to hit Tony with for ruining their little moment. _

\---

After four long months, Tony was finally released from the hospital. Still on a good amount of pain medication with a strict physical therapy routine and requiring a lot of help since he was still learning how to use the prosthetic and couldn’t stand for long and walking was still difficult.

But he could come home. 

Of course, the rest of the Avengers had a welcome home party prepared and they finally let Peter see the baby’s room that they had set up (they were adamant about waiting until Tony could be there, too) and it was… perfect. They had thought of and gotten everything they’d need for a newborn. Changing table, a ton of stuffed toys (including a full set of Avengers toys, of course), crib, rocking chair, dresser fully stocked with baby clothes, blankets, and burping cloths, a huge stack of diapers, and even a baby monitor. The walls were painted bright blues and soft greys - both of them were blown away by how much everyone did. 

And, as nice as that all was, what Peter was looking forward to the most was this.

Just laying in bed with Tony. No one around that would interrupt them. No nurses coming to take vitals or give medicine. No physical therapists or Avengers knocking on the door. 

They were just taking a nap right now. Tony was getting tired and Peter, by this point in the pregnancy, would never say no to the opportunity of a nap. Especially when he could fall asleep with Tony wrapped around him, his flesh hand resting idly on Peter’s stomach. 

It didn’t take long for Peter to doze off. Tony was asleep pretty much the second he laid down and they slept for a little while until Peter was woken up by Tony’s hand gently rubbing at the skin of his stomach and pressing kisses against his shoulder. 

Humming contentedly, Peter turned carefully to face him and smile sleepily up at Tony. “Hey,” he muttered, meeting Tony halfway for a kiss. “How’re you feeling?” he asked, reaching up to cup Tony's cheek in his hand and run a hand over the recently groomed line of facial hair along Tony's jaw. 

“Mm… Glad to be in my own bed,” Tony said with a soft chuckle.

“Yeah, me too,” Peter agreed. “It’s been hard to sleep without you. Bed’s too big for just one person,” he said. “‘Nd the baby likes to start kicking and moving right as I’m falling asleep usually.”

“Well, I’m here now. Don’t plan on leaving anytime soon,” Tony said and Peter could see the wince he was trying to hold back when he shifted a little.

“What time is it?” Peter asked even as he reached for his phone to look - if Tony was in that much pain he could probably take some more painkillers. “Oh shit, you were supposed to have more meds like an hour ago,” he frowned, moving to get up despite Tony’s protests.

“Y’know, I really should be the one taking care of you right now,” Tony said, struggling to push himself up to sit. It was still difficult to use the prosthetic and the movement tugged uncomfortably at the still-healing burns. 

“What, just because I’m pregnant?” Peter scoffed as he helped Tony sit up, wincing in sympathy at the pained hiss Tony let out as he moved. “Here, take these and we can lie down until they kick in,” Peter told him, dropping the array of pills into Tony’s hand and holding the cup of water out so Tony could grab it after tossing the pills into his mouth. 

“Well, yeah. You’re literally creating another human being from scratch. That’s… quite the feat, babe,” Tony chuckled. “I’m sure it hasn’t all been pleasant.”

“It’s worth it,” Peter shrugged. “Could’ve done without the puking but it hasn’t been too bad since that stopped. My back hurts sometimes but it’s nothing compared to the kind of pain you’ve been having to deal with. And… y’know… you’ll have your turn to take care of me when we have our next kid.” 

“Next kid?” Tony asked, raising an eyebrow at Peter. “You want to do this again?”

“Well… maybe. Ask me again after this one’s born,” he chuckled. 

“Will do,” Tony said with a smile.


	10. I'm learning to be brave in my beautiful mistakes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Thanksgiving (a day late) everyone!!!!!
> 
> Trying to update more frequently but work's been super busy (I work at a phone store so right now is the busiest time of the year). 
> 
> Buuut here's this.
> 
> With a bunch of smut in the beginning and then a few scenes with May and Peter talking later and making a discovery about the baby.

_The first time Peter slept over at Tony’s house it wasn’t planned. They just lost track of time and all of a sudden it was past midnight and Tony offered for Peter to stay. There was no way Peter was going to turn down that opportunity._

_Now he almost wished he had. _

_As wonderful as it was to fall asleep surrounded by Tony’s scent and warmth, Peter was absolutely mortified when he woke up hard and aching and pressed right up against Tony’s thigh. Peter could only remember bits and pieces of the dream he’d woken up from but even just from those little bits, he had a good idea that his predicament was directly related to it._

_“Ahhh,” Peter couldn’t help but whine as Tony shifted and, incidentally, pressed his thigh firmer against Peter’s erection. _

_“Mm, you okay?” Tony slurred, half asleep still._

_“U-Um… Yeah,” Peter squeaked out, frozen to the spot. But then Tony was shifting again and the friction created was enough to make Peter moan despite how hard he was trying not to._

_When Tony froze and tensed, Peter felt like he might die from embarrassment until Tony spoke. “Want some help with that?” Tony asked after a moment, voice still heavy and rough from sleep and something about it made a shiver go down Peter’s spine._

_“Please,” Peter breathed before he could stop himself. _

_Tony chuckled, pressing a kiss against the top of Peter’s head and slowly stroking down his back. “Ever finger yourself, baby?”_

_“Uh uh,” Peter admitted, burying his face against Tony’s neck so Tony couldn’t see how red his face was. _

_“Would you want to try it out?” Tony asked. “Or… I could blow you,” he offered. _

_“U-um… I-I uh… C-Can we… try that? The uh… The first thing,” Peter muttered against the older man’s shoulder. _

_“You want me to finger you?” Tony asked, waiting for Peter’s nod of confirmation before he went to reach for the little bottle of lube in his nightstand’s drawer. “Just try to stay relaxed. Tell me if it ever hurts.”_

_“Okay,” Peter said, heart rate tripling when he heard Tony pop the cap off of the lube. _

_“Sweetheart, you wanna take off those pants for me?” Tony asked, voice dipping low as he warmed up the lube between his fingers. _

_“Uh, yeah, yeah,” Peter muttered, scrambling to do just that even as his head spun from the dizzying mix of feelings running through him - arousal, embarrassment, anxiety. _

_Then there was a hand on his ass and Peter’s breath caught in his throat but he didn’t stop Tony, taking in a deep breath and slowly letting it out to try and calm himself. “‘M okay,” Peter muttered when he noticed that Tony had paused where he was. _

_“Good,” Tony muttered before pressing a finger between Peter’s thighs and rubbing, gentle but firm, against his hole. Not going in yet, just letting Peter get used to this first._

_“Oh fuck,” Peter moaned, a little surprised by how good having Tony’s finger just rubbing his hole felt. “Ah!” Peter yelped when Tony pressed the tip of that finger inside of him, gripping tight onto the older man’s shirt. That felt… better than expected. _

_“You like that, baby boy?”_

_“Yes,” Peter whined, pressing his hips back against Tony’s hand and gasping when Tony rubbed and prodded at his walls. “Tony!” he cried out when Tony hit… something inside of him and pleasure exploded through his whole body. _

_“Aha, found it,” Tony muttered smugly, slowly adding a second finger once he was sure Peter was relaxed enough for it. _

_“Oh my God,” Peter groaned desperately, hips twitching against Tony’s thigh and chest heaving with heavy breaths. “‘M close,” he warned in a high pitched whine. _

_“Yeah? Well, what’re you waiting for? Cum for me, kitten,” Tony growled into Peter’s ear, rubbing insistently at his prostate._

_That’s all it took, Peter crying out Tony’s name as his whole body shook and ropes of cum shot over the older man’s tented boxers - already planning on giving Tony a blowjob as soon as he caught his breath. _

“Holy shit,” Peter panted, collapsing against Tony’s chest as his release coated both of their stomachs and moaning at how Tony’s erection pressed against his thigh.

They couldn’t have sex yet. Tony’s wounds prevented that. But that didn’t mean they couldn’t be intimate at all. And right now, Peter couldn’t get enough of it. Now that he was significantly less stressed his libido came back full force and higher than ever before probably thanks to the pregnancy hormones. He always wanted Tony’s hands on him. Or, rather, in him. Of course, he’d much rather have Tony’s cock inside of him but that wasn’t possible without causing copious amounts of pain and possibly reopening the healing wounds. 

“Mmm… Lemme take care of you, darling,” Peter muttered, kissing Tony deeply before he moved to kneel between the older man’s thighs. He didn’t waste any time reciprocating, leaning down to suck the tip of Tony’s cock into his mouth.

“Fuck, baby,” Tony groaned, his flesh hand instantly tangling in Peter’s hair as he rocked his hips up gently. “Oh my God,” He groaned when Peter smoothly took all of his length in. He could feel his cock hit the back of Peter’s throat and he was kind of amazed at how well Peter took it even after such a long dry spell. Deepthroating him with ease. “So good for me, kitten. Absolutely perfect, baby boy. Holy shit, just seeing you all round and glowing and has been working me up for _weeks_.”

The words spilling out of Tony’s mouth only egged Peter along. Pulling out all of the stops and using every trick that he knew Tony liked. Rubbing his tongue against the underside of Tony’s cock, deepthroating him, swallowing around the tip of his erection and moaning at the praise and how Tony tugged at his hair.

Peter reached up to fondle Tony’s balls with the hand that wasn’t supporting himself, taking Tony all the way in again. He didn’t even need the warning that Tony was close with the way his breathing went ragged and how he was rocking his hips up into Peter’s mouth.

“Fuck, Pete, oh God,” Tony groaned, Peter working him through his orgasm and easily swallowing down every pulse of cum that came from him. 

Sated and happy, Peter curled up on Tony’s chest again after cleaning them both off. “Baby’s getting all restless now,” Peter muttered after a moment, idly tracing the scar over Tony’s chest where his arc reactor used to be. 

“I’m not surprised,” Tony muttered, rubbing his hand over Peter’s stomach and grinning when he felt the baby roll and stretch. 

Peter couldn't help but huff when FRIDAY chirped in that it was time to change the dressings on the burns and get Tony his medication. 

"I know," Tony sighed. "But that can wait. Hey, FRI, babe can you remind us again in 10 minutes?"

"Sure thing, boss," the AI replied and Peter relaxed against Tony again. 

They fell silent, just enjoying being skin to skin until FRIDAY spoke up again and Peter reluctantly removed himself from Tony’s side. 

After making sure Tony’s wounds were clean and properly bandaged, Peter curled up next to him again and within minutes he was asleep. 

Not that sleep lasted long. 

Peter woke with a start when Tony shook his shoulder, sitting upright and heaving in panicked breaths as his head spun. The nightmare he’d had still sitting vividly at the forefront of his mind. Being on the battlefield, begging Tony to hold on, FRIDAY’s voice sounding far too sad and sympathetic for an AI when she announced that she couldn’t get a read on any vitals. That Tony had died.

He didn’t even realize Tony was talking to him until the cold vibranium settled onto his bare knee startled him enough to jerk his head up towards Tony. “Tony,” he whimpered brokenly. “You - You were - I couldn’t - Y-You didn’t - I couldn't save you.”

“I’m right here, baby boy. I’m not going anywhere, sweetheart,” Tony said softly, reaching out to cup Peter’s cheek and wiping away the tears that fell. “I'm okay."

Peter sniffled softly, leaning into Tony's hand and turning his head to press a kiss against the older man's palm. "It was so real," he muttered with a soft shuddering sob.

"Baby, c’mere," Tony cooed, laying back down and pulling Peter onto his chest. "Nothing's gonna happen to me," he said, taking Peter's hand with his vibranium one and stiffly settling it onto the center of his chest so Peter could feel his heart beating. 

The tears slowly stopped but Peter still felt very awake, idly tracing over the healed scar on Tony's chest and focusing on the older man's steady breathing. "Sorry I woke you up," Peter muttered against Tony's shoulder. 

"It's okay," Tony said softly, kissing the top of Peter's head. "How long have these nightmares been happening?"

Peter didn't answer right away, contemplating if he wanted to be honest or not. "That specific one? Ever since the battle," he eventually replied. 

"Fuck," Tony sighed. "There's been others?"

"Of course," Peter scoffed.

Tony frowned, running his hand up and down Peter's arm. "Well, how's this - I'm hanging up the suit. No more fighting aliens or rogue AI's or Nazis. I'll leave all that to the rest of the team."

"Darling, you really think you'll be able to do that?" Peter asked skeptically. 

"Of course," Tony said instantly. "I mean, if it's you or Ben in danger things will be different - I’m not getting rid of the nanotech - but… no more nightmare-inducing missions for me. I'm done. I'm retired. I'll make the tech. Maybe focus a little more on SI. But, baby, my whole life is right here. You and Ben and whatever future children we have. I love you and I hate putting you through all this stress. That's ending right now."

"I love you, too, Tony. So much. I never want to lose you," Peter muttered, tilting his head up so he could kiss Tony. 

Tony kissed back, tangling his hand into Peter's messy hair and causing the younger man to all but melt against him.

\---

_’Tony Stark presumed dead’ is what the newspaper read. It’s what everyone was talking about - the billionaire’s disappearance. Peter had no idea, either. Despite how he was bombarded with phone calls and press wanting him to speak on Tony’s disappearance but he knew just as much everyone else. _

_Honestly, Peter was just trying to get by. His boyfriend was gone and he didn’t know if he was coming back. He just tried to focus on school and, maybe he stole a few of Tony’s hoodies and T-shirts to wear. Sometimes he’d stay at the penthouse instead of his dorm room - Tony’s given him nearly full access to the Avengers Tower by now. _

_Of course, his friends didn’t like that. That he was wearing Tony’s shirts and staying at the penthouse. They worried over him and told him that he should try to move on. _

_Like Tony was dead._

_“Peter, please, it’s not healthy to keep doing this. He’s gone. I told you this would-”_

_“I don’t need any ‘I told you so’s, May. Please,” Peter scoffed in frustration, wearing one of Tony’s old, faded MIT sweaters. “He’s not - They don’t know - Tony could still be out there.” _

_“Sweetie, the chances of that are-”_

_“May! Please. Just don’t,” Peter said through gritted teeth. “If you’re just going to keep talking about that and - and not listening to me I’ll just… go back to the tower.” _

_“I’m sorry, Pete. We’ll um… How’s school been going? Have you gotten your exams back yet?” she asked and Peter was immensely grateful for the change in subject._

_“Yeah. Well… for two of my classes. The other two haven’t come back yet,” Peter said, relaxing again now that they weren’t talking about Tony’s disappearance. As if Peter didn’t have enough nightmares about it already without May trying to tell him that his boyfriend wasn’t going to be coming back._

\---

“So how’s Tony doing?” May asked while they were having dinner. Now that Tony was out of the hospital they resumed their Monday night dinners together that they started after Peter moved out to go to college.

“Getting better. He’s able to use the vibranium arm more now and it seems like physical therapy is going pretty well. He can walk more and doesn’t get tired as easy,” Peter said. Months of just laying in a hospital bed definitely took a toll and building muscle tone after atrophy wasn’t that easy but Tony was getting there. 

“Good. That’s great,” May said with a smile, dishing up the lasagna between two plates and setting one in front of Peter. “How’re you feeling? How far along are you again?” 

“32 weeks already,” Peter chuckled. It was hard to believe the pregnancy had gone by so fast. “I’ve only got like… two months left before the baby’ll be here.” 

“Two months so…” May hummed thoughtfully before grinning, “We could have a Christmas baby.” 

Peter hesitated a moment, thinking about it. “Um… Yeah, I guess so,” he said - his due date was the 20th of December but his midwife said that it wasn’t uncommon for first-time mothers to go over their due date. It just never crossed his mind how close to Christmas that was. “God, I hope not,” he chuckled. 

“Why not? That’d be cute. Well, I guess you wouldn’t want to be in labor on Christmas but you gotta admit it’d be a good story,” May said. 

“Yeah, I definitely don’t want to spend Christmas giving birth and y’know, I feel like the poor kid would be robbed of a true birthday. We’d have to celebrate on a different day every year,” Peter said. 

“Just because you lucked out with a summer birthday doesn’t mean a bunch of kids don’t have to celebrate a different day because it’s a school day or because of a holiday. It’ll be fine,” May grinned. 

“Okay well… I’m not going to try to have a Christmas baby. But if it happens, it happens. ‘S not like I can really choose when the baby’s gonna come, anyway,” Peter sighed. He still hoped that wouldn’t be the case and would be doing everything in his power to, hopefully, have the baby before Christmas.

“That’s very true. I’m just saying it wouldn’t be the end of the world if that’s what happens,” May said, Peter just giving her an eye-roll as he dug into the food.


	11. Love just needs a witness...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all holy shit. So the reason this took so goddamn long is because my computer broke. Or, rather, I broke it. Accidentally, of course, but... Point is it's broke. 
> 
> So now I've got a new computer while my good one is in for repairs but it took a few days to get it.
> 
> Hope this extra-long chapter full of cuteness and smut makes up for it.
> 
> And please keep the comments coming!!!! I love every single one of them and appreciate y'all so much!!! <3 <3  
(Also saw that this was fic-recced on tumblr so if any of you guys saw it there and decided to check it out let me know! I'd love to know who read it bc of that!)

Peter’s heart felt like it was going to beat right out of his chest when he realized that Tony’s rambling was actually going somewhere. 

They were out on their first date ever since everything happened. Tony had reserved a private room at an upscale restaurant that Peter honestly couldn’t remember the name of. It was nice, though. Cozy and quiet where they sat and ate away from the main dining area. Tony had just ordered dessert for them and hadn’t shut up since the waiter left. 

Not that that was unusual for Tony. 

It was what he was saying that got Peter’s heart racing, though.

Talking about their relationship. Past and future. Being way more sentimental than Peter’s ever known Tony to be. And maybe a little nervous, too. 

“...I really wanted to do this differently but nothing ever seemed to work out. I’ve had this planned for so long and I wanted to do something special but… I don’t want to wait any longer,” Tony paused, sucking in a deep breath and pulling out a small box from his pocket. “I can’t kneel so I hope that doesn’t lose me any points here but... Peter Benjamin Parker, will you marry me?” Tony finally asked, managing to pop the box open.

It was everything Peter wanted. Simple. A thin gold band and a small ruby centerpiece. Nothing big or flashy. 

“Um…” Peter gaped, all the air in his lungs suddenly gone and, momentarily, he forgot how to even breathe - as if he had no idea this was coming, as if they hadn’t talked extensively about getting married previously, as if they weren’t expecting a baby in just a few months - unable to do anything but just stare at the ring Tony had held out to him.

For a reason Peter couldn’t explain he just couldn’t wrap his mind around it. It was just… different. Logically knowing that they were going to get married eventually did nothing to prepare Peter for the onslaught of emotions brought on by Tony _actually proposing_. 

“Babe?” Tony prodded after a moment, snapping Peter out of his thoughts. “Please say yes - I might have let slip to a few people that I’d have something a little more exciting than just my retirement to announce tomorrow at the press conference and I don’t have a backup plan.”

“Of course,” Peter breathed as soon as he could, letting out a laugh that bordered on hysterical. “Of course I’m going to say yes. Tony what - You actually think I’d say ‘no’?”

Tony’s worried expression broke into a grin and he shook his head. “Not a chance,” he chuckled, taking the ring from the box to slip onto the ring finger of Peter’s outstretched hand. “So you like it?”

“Darling, I love it,” Peter smiled fondly, staring down at the ring and leaning into the touch when Tony cupped his cheek and wiped away the few stray tears. 

Peter met Tony halfway for a kiss - not that it was a very good kiss, both of them smiling too much. Sharing clumsy kisses until the waiter interrupted them with the dessert that Tony ordered for them to share.

\---

_”What sort of ring would you want?” Tony asked as they laid in bed, basking in the afterglow that followed the early-morning sex they just had. The sun just starting to rise and flooding the room with soft light. _

_“Hmmm…” Peter hummed, “I don’t know. Nothing too flashy,” he shrugged. “Something small. I don’t really want a diamond. Something gold. Maybe a small ruby in the center. Y’know, your colors,” he smiled. _

_“I think I could do that,” Tony chuckled, rubbing a hand over Peter’s spine. _

_“My ring size is an 8, just so you know. Whenever you’re inclined to buy me that ring,” Peter grinned, arching his neck to kiss Tony softly. _

_“I knew that,” Tony muttered against Peter’s lips. _

_“Sure you did, darling,” Peter teased._

_“No, no, I did. I have proof. Hey FRI, pull up the order I placed a few days ago for Peter’s ring,” he said, grinning as FRIDAY projected the ring and details about it._

_It was everything Peter just said he didn’t want… But it was a size 8._

_“Please tell me you can still cancel that order,” Peter muttered. The ring was white gold and had several diamonds lining it with a large diamond centerpiece and Peter wheezed when he saw the price of it. _

_“FRIDAY you heard him. Cancel it,” Tony said. _

_Despite the fact that Peter hated the ring Tony originally bought, he couldn’t help but feel absolutely giddy at the fact that Tony had been planning a proposal. _

\---

“...You’re sure?” Peter asked, breathless and panting softly even as Tony pulled away. Slick fingers leaving Peter’s body, causing a shiver to go down his spine.

“‘Course,” Tony said easily, vibranium hand idly resting on Peter’s hip, the other settling on his thigh. “Baby boy, it’s been far too long since I’ve been able to fuck you.”

Another little shiver went down Peter’s spine at how Tony’s voice went low and he leaned down to kiss Tony. It was far too difficult to argue with that - especially with Peter still riding the emotional high of Tony finally, officially proposing earlier that night. “Promise you’ll tell me if I hurt you…?” 

“Promise,” Tony said in a low rumble, already coating his erection with the leftover lube sticking to his hand from fingering Peter. “Now c’mere kitten,” Tony said, tugging Peter closer by his hips until Peter readjusted to straddle his hips - trying to avoid the sensitive scars left from the burns as much as he could.

It took a couple of moments to find a good position between Tony’s scars and Peter’s growing stomach but they managed. Peter gripping Tony’s shoulders for support and gasping when he felt Tony’s hard cock prodding against his hole. “Oh fuck,” Peter whined at the initial stretch as he started to lower his hips down onto Tony, burying his face against Tony’s neck. 

By the time he was fully seated in Tony’s lap both of them were panting and the grip Tony had on Peter’s hips had turned almost painful. Not that Peter minded. He loved it when Tony left bruises and hickeys. The bite of pain also kept his brain from melting into complete mush from pleasure. Hyper-sensitive from the pregnancy and the fact that they haven’t been able to actually have sex for months.

“Fuck, baby, you have no idea how much I’ve missed this,” Tony started, voice all deep and rough. His flesh hand moving to rub up and down Peter’s back. “God - You’re so perfect for me, kitten. All round and soft and… Fuck, you look so good pregnant.” 

“Tony,” Peter whined, high pitched and desperate as he rolled his hips. Every single nerve in his body electrified between the way that Tony’s cock was stretching him and pressing right against his prostate and the words spilling from the older man’s mouth. “Oh God,” he gasped when Tony ground up against him, pushing the head of his cock harder against Peter’s walls and making stars dance behind his eyes. 

They kept up that slow, deep pace. Tony’s hands roaming all over Peter’s body. Cool vibranium soothing Peter’s overheated skin and Tony’s flesh hand going between being tangled in Peter’s hair or playing with his puffy, oversensitive nipples. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, Tony, ahhh,” Peter gasped, feeling his orgasm building as heat coiled low in his stomach and he sped up the little rolls of his hips just a little more, nails digging into Tony’s good shoulder. 

“Gonna cum for me, kitten? C’mon baby boy, wanna see you. Don’t hold back,” Tony urged, rolling one of Peter’s nipples between his fingers - just a little surprised by the few drops of milk that leaked out but Peter didn’t seem to notice and Tony didn’t care. 

Especially when Peter cried out, his whole body shaking as his cock twitched and spurted cum between them. It was that coupled with how he was clenching around Tony that sent him over the edge, grinding up against Peter until they were both spent.

\---

_Honestly, even while they dated Peter never thought he would _actually_ lose his virginity to Tony Stark. _

_It still didn’t feel real. Basking in the afterglow all curled up on Tony’s chest, a hand resting gingerly over the arc reactor there. All but purring and unable to stop the seemingly permanent smile on his face even when his cheeks started to ache. _

_It didn’t even hurt like Peter expected it to._

_That probably had something to do with how Tony relentlessly ate him out for what seemed like hours beforehand. Peter lost track of how many times he came. It had to be some sort of personal record, though. _

_“How’re you feeling, babe?” Tony asked, breaking the silence and pulling Peter out of his thoughts._

_At that moment, Peter couldn’t get his brain to make words so instead he just let out a content sigh and nuzzled against Tony’s neck. Earning a laugh from the man. _

_“Alright well… We can cuddle for a few more minutes but then I’m cleaning us up and making you drink some water. That sound good, kitten?” Tony asked, amusement and a little smugness clear in his voice._

_“‘Kay,” Peter managed. _

__

\---

Like all of the press conferences Peter attended since starting his relationship with Tony he just stood next to him - not doing most of the talking but there ready to support Tony if he needed it. There were a few questions here and there directed towards Peter and he answered to the best of his ability but most of it was about Tony’s recovery and his decision to retire.

At least until they announced their engagement.

Then most of the questions were directed towards Peter about his feelings on the engagement, Tony’s retirement, and the child they were having. It was a little overwhelming to have that much focus on him but Peter just kept to Tony’s tips on handling the press. Short, simple answers. Skipping past questions that had already been answered. And ignoring the reporters purposely trying to get a rise from him by asking outrageous questions. 

Once it got to the point where Tony had to throw an arm around Peter’s shoulders and lean on him to keep standing he ended it and let Peter help him to the back to sit down and rest. 

“I’m fine, Pete, I just gotta sit for a minute,” Tony assured even as Peter pressed a bottle of water into Tony’s hand. 

“I know,” Peter said. “You should still drink some water. I think all you’ve had today was coffee,” he scoffed.

“And a pancake,” Tony corrected, unscrewing the cap of the water bottle and taking a few sips to quell Peter’s worrying.

“That’s not fluid, darling,” Peter said with an eye roll. 

Tony opened his mouth to speak again when Peter suddenly hissed in pain, wincing and pressing a hand against the top of his stomach. “You okay?” Tony asked, worry lacing his voice as he instinctively reached out for Peter’s other hand. “Baby’s not coming, right?” he asked, feeling his heart drop all the way through his stomach at the possibility - it was still way too early for that. 

Peter shook his head, taking in a deep breath and slowly letting it out. “No. Your kid’s just an asshole and thought it would be a good idea to kick me in the ribs,” he said, voice still tight with pain. “I can’t wait until this is over,” Peter muttered once the baby repositioned and the pain faded. 

“You don’t have too much longer, babe,” Tony said, “Bet you’re starting to change your mind about that second kid, though, huh?”

“Hmmm,” Peter hummed thoughtfully, thinking about it for a second. “No. Not at all. It’s still worth it.”

Tony smiled up at him, warm and with that look of adoration in his eyes that always took Peter’s breath away. “I love you,” he said softly. 

“I love you, too,” Peter grinned, leaning down with some difficulty so he could kiss Tony.

\---

_The press fallout after Tony and Peter officially confirmed their relationship was way worse than Peter expected. News reporters bombarding Peter at the most inconvenient times. Like when he was late for a class. Or trying to meet up with friends._

_They always asked the same questions. About the age gap. Asking if he felt like Tony was coercing him into the relationship or bribing him. Several people started referring to Tony as Peter’s ‘sugar daddy’ and saying that he was only with Tony for his money. He rolled his eyes at it at the time but the next time Tony took him out - shopping and dinner - Peter couldn’t help but think about it. _

_Even worse when Tony bought him the textbooks he needed for his classes. And a whole new wardrobe. A brand new high-end laptop. And then booked them a trip to Italy. _

_When Tony gifted him a white gold watch that had to cost more than Peter would ever be able to wrap his head around, that’s when he snapped._

_“I can’t do this anymore,” he said, dropping the box the watch came in on the coffee table. _

_“Pete, what - I…” Tony trailed off, confusion and hurt clear on his face. “If you don’t like the watch I can get you a different one or something else you don’t have to-”_

_“It’s not that,” Peter cut him off. “It’s… everything. I appreciate it, really, I do. And I’m not going to stop you from buying my school stuff or - or paying for our dates if you want to but… this - Tony, I didn’t need a whole collection of high-end clothes. Or a brand new laptop. Fuck, I’m too scared to even wear most of the clothes you bought for me. I don’t want to mess up a pair of designer 300 dollar jeans.” _

_Tony just stared wide-eyed at him. “I don’t… What?” he asked, like he couldn’t wrap his mind around why Peter _wouldn’t_ want nice clothes and new tech. _

_Peter took in a deep breath and let it out in a heavy sigh, shaking his head. “People are calling you my… my sugar daddy. I don’t like it,” he said with a scowl. “They think I’m only with you for your money.”_

_“Who cares what other people think? I like doing these things for you,” Tony said, reaching out to grab Peter’s hand. _

_“I know. But… Tony, I’ve never worn a watch before in my whole entire life. I liked my old laptop because it was small and easy to transport. I - Those designer clothes are just… uncomfortable,” Peter stressed. “I don’t need all of that. And… sometimes it feels like _you_ think I’m only with you for your money. Like you have to buy my affection.”_

_Tony frowned at him, but didn’t argue. “Just… tell me what you do like. I’ll adjust.”_

_“That’s not what…” Peter sighed heavily, letting go of Tony’s hand and burying his face in his hands. “That’s not what I was trying to say. Darling, I don’t need these gifts to love you,” Peter said, looking back up at Tony. “I love you because I can be as big of a nerd as I want around you. I love you because you took your time you were patient with me when you found out I was a virgin. You didn’t just… take advantage of that. I love you because we can spend hours in your lab just talking and tinkering with things. I love you because you truly care about people despite what everyone else thinks. You’re trying to make the world better and protect everyone in it. I just… I love you. Even if you weren’t ridiculously rich, I would still love you.”_

_The way that Tony was staring at him with a little fond smile made Peter’s heart skip a beat and he couldn’t help but crawl into Tony’s lap, loosely wrapping his arms around Tony’s shoulders and pressing their foreheads together gently. “I love you so much,” Peter whispered. _

_“I love you too, baby,” Tony said softly, tilting his head up to kiss Peter. “‘M not canceling our trip to Italy, though.”_

_“I never asked you to,” Peter chuckled. “That can stay. The clothes need to go, though,” he said, going quiet for a moment before speaking up again. “Y’know… maybe we could… Have you ever gone thrift shopping?” Peter asked, grinning._

_“Uh… No,” Tony snorted. _

_“Let’s do that on our next date. We’ll go thrifting and… I’ll show you my favorite little sandwich shop,” Peter said, laughing at the way Tony’s eyes widened in disbelief. Like he couldn’t believe Peter actually suggested that he go _thrift shopping_._

_“Um… Yeah, sure, whatever you want, sweetheart,” Tony said, rubbing a hand over Peter’s back._

_“How does… this upcoming Saturday sound?” Peter asked, already planning it all out in his head._

_“Sounds good,” Tony said, pulling Peter back down into another kiss._


	12. ...And a little forgiveness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y'all! I'm sorry it's been so long between updates recently. I've been working like crazy and also had to go to court on jury duty this past week. 
> 
> Planning on the next chapter coming out before Christmas because of what I've got planned for them.
> 
> We're getting to the end here, guys (but I'm already planning a possible sequel. Maybe. Idk yet. We'll see.)
> 
> Anyways, as always I appreciate every one of your comments and PLEASE leave a comment if you liked the story! And tell me if you want a sequel, too. If enough people do I'll start fleshing out an outline for it.

_”People actually buy this stuff?” Tony asked skeptically, gingerly holding up the corner of a rather interesting paisley patterned curtain. _

_“I mean… maybe not _that_,” Peter laughed, “But you can find some cool things at thrift shops.”_

_“Sure,” Tony shook his head, letting the curtain fall back into place and idly following Peter around the small shop. There weren’t many people there but the aisles were narrow and crowded and Peter could tell that Tony wasn’t impressed. _

_“C’mon, darling, it’s not that bad. This is where I got the majority of my clothes before I met you,” Peter said, “And kitchenware. And found a couple of really old movies that were pretty cool. Star Wars, Alien…”_

_“Really old… Jesus, I keep forgetting you’re only like 19,” Tony groaned. “Please, please stop reminding me.”_

_Peter just laughed, grinning as he held up a little Iron Man action figure that was missing an arm. “Oh my god, I need this,” Peter said._

_“You - Why? It’s a toy. And… broken,” Tony scowled at it. _

_“Gives it character. And I like collecting little action figures,” Peter shrugged. “My Uncle used to.”_

_Tony hesitated a moment and Peter could see the struggle happening within him to argue or just let it be. “Fine,” Tony eventually said._

_Not wanting to torture Tony much longer, Peter just got the little action figure and they left. Per Peter’s insistence to walk instead of drive, they went hand-in-hand the few blocks down to Delmar’s and Peter ordered for both of them. _

_“I got it,” Peter said as Tony went to pull out his wallet, digging into his pockets to find the $20 that he had put aside for this exact thing. “Let me treat you for once.”_

_“If you insist,” Tony said amusedly, letting Peter pay and lead them to the small sitting area outside. _

\---

“God, it’s still so weird that you’re like… getting married and having a kid and everything,” Ned shook his head while they were out on their weekly get-together that had honestly been more like bi- or tri-weekly recently.

“Yeah and once you pop that kid out we’ll see you even less,” MJ complained.

“That’s not true,” Peter rolled his eyes at her as they wandered around the mall trying to do some Christmas shopping. “And, y’know, you guys are always welcome over at the compound. And once Tony and I agree on a house you’ll be welcome there, too.” 

“What are we supposed to do? Just show up? What the hell would we say? What if Captain America is there? Or - Or the Hulk or holy shit what if _Thor_ is there?” Ned gasped, looking absolutely horrified.

Peter couldn’t help but laugh, shaking his head. “They’re all really nice. Steve and Dr. Banner especially. Thor is… a little weird and can come on pretty strong but he means well,” Peter said. “Anyways, he’s off-planet and Dr. Banner doesn’t come around too often.” 

“It’s still seriously intimidating,” Ned said as they looked through one of the little kiosks that had set up along the middle of the mall.

“I don’t know,” MJ hummed thoughtfully, “It would be pretty cool to talk to some of them, especially Thor. I mean, he’s from a different planet and -” MJ hesitated, putting down the ornament she was looking at as she noticed Peter’s pained expression, “Peter, are you okay?”

“Um…” Peter hesitated, taking in a deep breath and slowly letting it out as the pain faded, glancing at the time on his phone. He’s been having contractions on and off all morning but they were pretty far apart and not painful until recently. The last few hurt. A lot. And Peter was starting to realize that he could very possibly be in labor. He was full-term starting three days ago. “I think I’m in labor,” he breathed as the realization hit, only vaguely aware of everyone in earshot range suddenly staring at him.

“What?!” Ned gasped - only drawing more attention to them.

“Are… are you sure, Peter? Because if you seriously think you’re in labor maybe we should um… leave,” MJ said.

“I don’t know,” Peter said, settling a hand onto his stomach. “Let’s find someplace to sit, let me drink some water and see if the contractions keep coming. I'll text Happy to be ready just in case."

“Good idea,” MJ agreed while Peter sent out that text.

“Wait - wait, what do you mean you don’t know?” Ned asked as they started to walk towards the food court in the mall, both himself and MJ sticking close by Peter.

“I just - I don’t know. I’m having contractions and they’re worse than the normal like Braxton hicks ones I’ve been getting but it still could be a false alarm,” Peter sighed. “My midwife said I’d probably go past my due date but that’s not for… a week and a half.”

“And what if it’s not a false alarm?” Ned asked uneasily, sharing a worried look with MJ.

“Then I’ll have Happy come pick us up and I’ll text you guys with some cute pictures of Ben tomorrow,” Peter said. “I mean, if I’m in labor it’s still early. It’ll be _hours_ before the baby actually comes if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“Right. Right, okay,” Ned breathed. 

Once seated, Ned hurried to get Peter some water and sat down with Peter and MJ. “Maybe you should let Tony know,” MJ suggested after a few minutes when Peter seemed to relax after another contraction.

“No, no it’s fine. I don’t want to worry him if nothing is actually happening,” Peter said, restarting the timer on his phone. That one was 5 minutes after the last. Which… could be worrying. But Peter wasn’t going to panic yet.

“Kinda looks like something’s happening,” MJ said. “How will you know?”

“Um… Just if they’re consistent and steady. Which… I haven’t been paying enough attention to know,” Peter admitted.

“So that - how long have you been having contractions?” MJ asked, eyes going wide at him.

“A few hours. Not bad ones, though. It just started to hurt,” Peter sighed, “Like I said there’s still going to be hours before anything serious happens. My midwife said that guys are usually in labor for a lot longer. Like… 16 hours is the average.”

Ned couldn’t help but wince in sympathy. “That sounds horrible.”

"Yeah. I'm hoping it doesn't take that long," Peter said. 

They sat there for a little while longer, Peter telling them about how Tony proposed and just chatting while Peter sucked down a few cups of water and kept timing his contractions. 

When they didn’t let up within the next half hour, Peter had Happy come around to pick them back up and parted ways with Ned and MJ with a promise to keep them updated.

\---

_ “You sure you’re not…”_

_“Pregnant?” Peter filled in as Tony trailed off. It was a question that had been asked way too much for Peter’s comfort recently. “No,” he sighed. “I mean - yes. No, I’m not pregnant. Yes, I’m sure,” Peter scoffed, rubbing his temples as the lingering headache he’s had started to get worse - the whole reason Tony was fussing over him again. _

_“Maybe you should go get checked out,” Tony said, reaching out to rub a hand over Peter’s shoulder until the younger man shrugged him off._

_“Maybe you should go make sure Dr. Banner isn’t killing Scott,” Peter grumbled when he heard yelling coming from the other side of the large room where Bruce and Scott were doing some preliminary tests. _

_“Sweetheart,” Tony sighed, “Please-”_

_“Don’t,” Peter muttered, “I - I’m gonna… go lie down. Come get me if you need me,” he said as he got up - still more than a little upset about Tony going against his wishes and lying to him about not pursuing time travel anymore. _

_That’s how Peter rationalized not telling Tony about his trip to the doctor’s office earlier or about the bits of doubt starting to filter in ever since his doctor insisted on running a blood test to, among other things, test for pregnancy._

_Tony didn’t try and follow this time. Peter just dodging past Thor and Natasha as he walked back into the living quarters of the compound. He laid down in their room, having FRIDAY make it as dark as possible to help soothe his pounding head but also making sure to pay attention to his phone in case the doctor’s office called him back._

__

\---

It was a false alarm.

Peter couldn’t decide if he felt relieved or disappointed about it. He didn’t want to have the baby on Christmas and he was more than ready to be done with the pregnancy but… He was also terrified. Of giving birth and of everything that would follow. 

By now he and Tony were just relaxing. It’s been a few hours since the contractions faded away and Peter had made himself comfortable sprawled across the couch, head in Tony’s lap. Steve and Bucky would check in every once in a while to make sure nothing changed and Peter sent a text out to Ned and MJ to tell them that he wouldn’t have any cute baby pictures for them tomorrow.

“I don’t even know what to do with a baby,” Peter admitted, turning his head to look up at Tony. “Do you?” 

“What do you mean?” Tony asked, a hint of amusement in his voice as he ran his fingers through Peter’s hair. 

“Like besides feeding him and making sure he’s clean and warm. What do we _do_ with him?” Peter asked with a little frown, a hand idly rubbing over his stomach where Ben was currently kicking. “I’ve never really been around babies… I mean, I’ve held babies before but only for a few minutes.”

“I… Think that’s pretty much it for the first few months,” Tony said. “Just keep him content. Talk to him.”

“Maybe we should read one of those parenting books,” Peter said. “Or… y’know, there’s a lot of vloggers that have kids and make videos about them,” he hummed in thought. 

“Yeah. I’ve seen some of those. Y’know I’m kind of surprised you didn’t do a video diary or a journal or something,” Tony commented, his hand trailing down over Peter’s shoulder to rest against his stomach. 

“Never thought of it with everything else happening,” Peter said absently - he’d kept up with the weekly pictures but that was going to be a surprise for Tony after Ben is born. It was supposed to be a Christmas present - hopefully still will be. “I’ll do something like that with our next kid.”

“If we have another,” Tony said, “If you decide you want to go through all of this again.”

“I want another kid. I always wanted a sibling growing up and… you weren’t able to be there for most of this,” Peter said softly. “You weren’t there when I found out, you weren’t there for almost all of the ultrasounds and appointments. Or… when I could feel him kick for the first time. You missed a lot. I know that has to bother you, too,” Peter said.

“Hurts a little, yeah,” Tony admitted. “When did you find out, anyways?”

Peter could feel his heart skip a beat and he tried not to visibly tense at the question. “U-Um… Find what out?” he asked after a moment of hesitation. Tony would be _pissed_ if he knew that Peter found out before the battle and didn’t tell him.

“That you were pregnant, Pete,” Tony clarified. “Must’ve been pretty soon after the battle, right?”

As much as Peter tried he couldn’t get his brain to cooperate with his throat and mouth to speak. “U-Um…” he muttered, slowly sitting up so he wasn’t in Tony’s lap anymore.

“Peter,” Tony started again, voice low - a warning. “Please. Please, for the love of God don’t tell me you knew when you put that suit on and faced off against Thanos.” 

“I uh…” Peter stuttered, not looking at Tony. “Does it even matter now?” he stammered. 

“Does it - Peter what - Hold on, you-” Tony took in a deep breath and, glancing up, Peter didn’t miss the way Tony’s jaw clenched before releasing that breath. “Of course it fucking matters!”

Peter couldn't help but flinch a little. "But - I mean - everything turned out fine. The baby's okay, I'm okay.”

The way that Tony was looking at him - cold and angry - made Peter’s blood run cold. He’d never had Tony’s anger directed towards him before and, despite knowing that Tony would never hurt him, it was terrifying. 

“When? Exactly when did you find out?” Tony demanded.

“U-Um… It - it was the day before, I-”

“So you lied to me,” Tony cut him off. “You - I asked. I fucking asked if you even thought you could be pregnant and you said ‘no’.” 

“I - I didn’t know - when you asked, I didn’t know,” Peter tried, even as he shifted away from Tony.

“You must’ve had an idea, though, since you went and got a test,” Tony said, sighing heavily and getting up - it was still difficult for him by himself but he managed. “I’ll be in my lab. I need… a few minutes,” he said, walking away.

Peter just watched wide-eyed and frozen to the spot as Tony left the room.

\---

_Peter wasn’t surprised when Tony wasn’t in bed even as 2AM hit. Not that Peter had been sleeping, either. At least not well. Tossing and turning, thinking about what tomorrow might bring for them and what he had learned today. _

_He was pregnant._

_Which is what they wanted. They wanted to have a baby. Peter had been trying to get pregnant. _

_But the timing and circumstances couldn’t have been worse. No one knew what would happen when they did the whole time heist thing and that terrified Peter. He wasn’t sure how he’d be able to survive if something happened to Tony. His aunt and friends were already gone and he knew the Avengers and Pepper and Happy would be there for him but…_

_Peter didn’t want to have a baby if Tony wasn’t there with him._

_When Peter heard their bedroom door open and close, he sat up to squint over at Tony. “Hey, darling,” he said softly, bringing his knees up to his chest. _

_Tony froze for a second, tilting his head at Peter. “Haven’t heard that name in a while,” he commented, stripping off his shirt. “You done being angry at me?”_

_“No,” Peter scoffed. “Not if you’re going to say it like that, at least,” he said. “Just... come to bed.”_

_“That’s what I was planning on baby,” Tony said, pushing his jeans off and pulling on a pair of sweatpants before crawling onto the bed with Peter to lie down._

_Peter could almost feel the confusion coming off of Tony in waves as he promptly curled up on Tony’s chest instead of staying firmly on his side of the bed like he has been since the night they figured out time travel. _

_“I love you,” Peter muttered against Tony’s skin, pressing a soft, chaste kiss against Tony’s lips._

_“I love you, too, sweetheart,” Tony replied with a small smile. _

\---

“Pete, baby, why’re you still awake?” Tony asked as he came into their room.

“Can’t sleep,” Peter answered simply, looking up over his laptop at Tony. “Wasn’t sure if you were even going to come to bed,” he admitted, closing the computer and setting it aside. 

“Yeah, I wasn’t either,” Tony sighed, going to sit on the bed.

“I’m sorry, Tony, really. I know I should have told you but - but if I did you wouldn’t have let me stay and help,” Peter said.

“Yeah. And you shouldn’t have been there,” Tony said, turning to look at Peter. “Seriously, Pete, what if something _had_ happened? What if you took a hard hit and miscarried? What if - Shit, Peter, there are a million things that could have gone wrong.”

“I get that but - but those are all ‘what if’s that didn’t happen, Tony. I wanted to be there in case something happened to you - and it did,” Peter tried to explain. “I’m sorry for lying to you. But you have to understand why I did. Please, darling, at least try to understand. If things had been the other way around you would have done the same.”

Tony took in a deep breath, holding it for a few seconds before slowly letting it out and shaking his head. “Yeah. Maybe,” he muttered, shifting to lay down. “C’mere,” he said, raising his arm so Peter could lay on his chest.

Peter settled in, sighing contentedly as Tony rubbed his hand over Peter’s arm. He knew things weren’t completely fixed yet, but being back in Tony’s arms made Peter feel immensely better. “I love you,” he muttered.

“I love you, too,” Tony said, pressing a kiss against the top of Peter’s head.


	13. I wouldn't trade the pain for what I've learned

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy holidays everyone!! And a very merry Christmas to those who celebrate it!
> 
> Wanted to have this up yesterday but um...
> 
> Hopefully, y'all will accept this as a Christmas present? Idk.
> 
> But uh... before we get started:
> 
> WARNING: There is a graphic birth scene in this chapter. Proceed with caution if that's not something you are okay with reading. 
> 
> Also, I wasn't sure what to do for flashbacks so I just put some in that kind of explained bits and pieces of their relationship that I couldn't find a spot for before.
> 
> And PLEASE COMMENT! I appreciate each and every one of them. So if you liked the story leave even a short comment <3 It fuels my desire to write.

It was the morning of the 23rd when Peter woke up at just after 4AM because of a contraction. Which wasn’t exactly abnormal in the past few weeks. But then there was another one just as he was starting to fall back asleep. Not to mention the way his back was aching that made it impossible to find a comfortable position. 

Eventually, Peter gave up on going back to sleep - it just wasn’t happening and he didn’t want to wake Tony up with his tossing and turning so he got up to go drink some water and curl up in what had become his favorite spot recently. The corner of the large sectional where he had compiled a nest of pillows and blankets. 

He was trying not to get his hopes up too high even as the contractions continued steadily. If he went into labor now then he’d definitely have Ben before Christmas. And he was getting sick and tired of being pregnant in general. 

The constant backaches, having to pee every half hour, never being able to sleep but being constantly exhausted at the same time, or when Ben would move just right and kick him in the ribs. He did his absolute best not to complain about it after all that Tony had gone through in the past couple months. Peter was sure having a baby was nothing compared to getting a limb cut off and being covered in severe burns. 

Tony was still upset with him, too. 

He usually didn’t show it more than a few little quips here and there but he’d been spending a lot more time in his lab making up excuses about Peter not being allowed in there. Saying it was too dangerous with Peter being pregnant. It was bullshit but Peter wasn’t going to try and argue with Tony right now. Just let him have his space. As long as Tony still came to bed every night.

“Babe?”

Tony’s voice made Peter jump slightly, looking up from his phone to see his fiance standing by the end of the couch. “Hey,” Peter greeted softly. 

“Why’re you up? It’s like… 5am,” Tony grumbled. 

Peter debated for a moment if he wanted to risk panicking Tony and telling him the truth about having contractions when it might just be another false alarm. At least until another one came that took his breath away and he had to actually focus on breathing through the pain. 

Yeah. That wasn’t a Braxton Hicks contraction. They’d never been that bad. Or this steady.

“Pete? Sweetie?” Tony prodded, coming closer to sit next to Peter. “Baby, you gotta talk to me. Is the baby coming?” he asked, a tinge of panic seeping into his voice.

“I think so, yeah,” Peter nodded once he could talk again. 

“How sure is ‘I think so’?” Tony asked and Peter couldn’t blame him. There have been several false alarms that panicked everyone in the past few weeks but this was completely different. 

“Like… really sure. I’ve been up a little over an hour and the contractions have been right around 7 minutes apart and… they feel different. Stronger, I guess,” Peter shrugged, not sure how to explain it. “So… I think we’re going to have a baby today. Hopefully.”

Peter could see the color draining from Tony’s face even in the dim lighting. “Right. Right, okay. Yeah. That’s… good, I guess,” Tony breathed. “Um… I’ll call your midwife then and-”

“Tony,” Peter cut him off. “Calm down. We don’t need to call Andrea yet. He said when the contractions are um… I think it was 4 minutes apart or when my water breaks is when we need to call him. Just… send him a text to give him a heads up,” he said, trying to keep his own voice even and sure. 

“Okay,” Tony nodded, taking in a deep breath and slowly letting it out. “How’re you feeling?” he asked, reaching out to take one of Peter’s hands. 

“Not sure yet,” Peter said with a shrug. “Anxious. Hope this is really it,” he said.

“Yeah,” Tony nodded. "I can't wait to meet our son finally," Tony said with a smile, "And we'll be able to avoid celebrating a birthday and Christmas on the same day."

"Barely," Peter scoffed. 

"Yeah. Well… you should eat and maybe try to rest some more," Tony said, "What do you want for breakfast? I can make it."

Peter couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at Tony. "Um… no thanks. I'll just have cereal."

"What? Don't think I can cook?"

"I know you can't, darling. You nearly set your penthouse on fire trying to make pasta once," Peter said pointedly. 

"That was like three years ago, Pete."

"Yeah, and you've never cooked since," Peter chuckled. 

Tony glared at him, shaking his head. "Whatever. You still need to eat. C'mon," Tony said, standing back up and holding a hand out to Peter.

“I don’t need help,” Peter said - honestly not sure if Tony would be able to support him. It was a little bit of a struggle but he managed, pausing halfway as a contraction hit and grabbing onto Tony anyways. Not leaning on him, just holding onto the vibranium arm for balance as he focused on breathing.

"You're doing good, babe," Tony praised, smoothing back Peter's sleep-messy hair until he relaxed and was able to move again. 

"Hey, what're you guys doing up?"

Steve's voice made both of them look up towards him. "Could ask you the same thing. I'm going to take a stab in the dark here and guess that it’s not because you’re in labor, too? Unless you’ve been hiding a pregnancy from all of us,” Tony quipped. 

The confused look Steve gave Tony quickly changed to shock when he processed what Tony was saying. "Peter's in labor?"

"Yeah. Pretty sure," Peter answered. "I've been up since like… 4AM with contractions."

"So this is it? We're having a baby today?" Steve asked. 

“Yeah, think so,” Peter said. Now that he was more awake he could even feel that the baby had dropped between how his lower back was aching and the pressure on his hips.

“You never did answer why you’re up at hell-o-clock,” Tony pointed out. 

“I always get up around 5 to go on a run,” Steve said. 

Tony furrowed his eyebrows at Steve, shaking his head. “Right. Do you even need to? Like work out and run and everything? Doesn’t the whole super-soldier serum stuff keep you in shape?”

“Don’t know. Don’t want to risk it. Anyways, helps clear my mind,” Steve shrugged. 

“Well don’t let us stop you,” Tony shrugged.

“I was actually going to make some breakfast first. You guys hungry?” Steve offered. 

“Yeah. Peter needs to eat. Keep his strength up,” Tony said, the three of them making their way to the kitchen - soon joined by Bucky after Steve got some coffee going and bacon cooking.

\---

_”What’d you want to name it?” Peter asked, sprawled out on the couch on his back, head in Tony’s lap and his hand absently laying on his stomach. _

_“Hmm… I’ve always liked the name ‘Morgan’. Could work for a boy or a girl,” Tony suggested. “Y’know, if ‘it’ is a thing,” Tony chuckled, playing with Peter’s hair. _

_“Yeah,” Peter sighed, humming softly in content. “God, I hope so. If only to have a reason for why I’ve felt so shitty lately,” he grumbled._

_They ditched the condoms a couple months ago and, while trying not to get their hopes up, Peter has been feeling off for a few weeks. The at-home test came back negative but that was pretty common for men so they went to get a blood test done. Just in case. _

_“Don’t get your hopes up too high, babe. Doc said it probably won’t happen without hormones and a lot of planning,” Tony reminded him. _

_“I know. But like… even if I’m not pregnant now we’re going to have a baby eventually so… We’ll need a name for it,” he said, sitting up and turning to face Tony on the couch. “I like Morgan. If we have a boy I want his middle name to be Benjamin. After my Uncle,” Peter said. “Not sure if the name Morgan Benjamin sounds great, though,” he added with a little grimace._

_“Hmm… We’ll figure something out,” Tony said. “Save Morgan for a girl and come up with a different first time if we have a boy.”_

_“Yeah,” Peter said, smiling fondly at Tony. “I can’t wait to have a family with you,” he said wistfully._

_“Me, too, sweetheart.”_

\---

"Y'know," Tony started around a mouthful of eggs as they ate breakfast. "If Bucky hadn't let it slip, I would never had figured out you guys were uh… what do you call it, Cap? Fondue-ing?" Tony teased.

Peter didn't miss the way Steve's face flushed and jaw clenched at Tony’s words. Even as distracted he was from how bad his back was aching and the contractions he's been having ever since he woke up.

"I like to keep things private," Steve replied shortly. "Unlike you."

"There's nothing wrong with that," Peter chimed in before Tony started to antagonize him more. 

“Well no but you don’t have to hide it, either,” Tony said. "I get not wanting the press to know but you can relax around us. No one here is going to judge you."

"That’s what I keep trying to tell him," Bucky sighed, coming to stand behind Steve and rub his shoulders.

“I know. I know you won't. I just need some time to… adjust,” Steve said with a sigh, visibly relaxing a little even as Bucky leaned down to press a kiss at the top of his head. 

“Anyone want pancakes?” Bucky asked and Peter was glad for the change of subject.

He just couldn’t focus enough to talk about something as serious as Steve’s deep-seeded fears of homophobia. Before he could answer the question, though, he could feel a contraction starting and he was more focused on breathing than trying to talk.

“You okay, kid?" 

“Huh?” Peter muttered, looking up at Bucky and snapping out of the daze of pain as the contraction stopped. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. Just… contractions."

“Do you want some pancakes…?” Bucky repeated a little softer, sending Peter a sympathetic look. 

“Um… no thanks,” Peter answered absently, sipping at his orange juice. "I think I'm going to try laying down for a while," Peter said as he got up, pausing to kiss Tony before he shuffled off to their room.

Getting comfortable still wasn’t possible, but Peter managed to doze off for a while. It wasn’t good sleep by any means and he woke up here and there whenever he had a particularly painful contraction.

Feeling only slightly more rested, Peter decided to get up just as Tony walked in. Yawning softly as he stretched and looked up at his fiance. “Hey,” he said. 

“Hey, baby. How’re you feeling?” Tony asked, “Still contracting?” 

“Yeah,” Peter breathed, wincing when he felt one start. They were definitely more painful. Wrapping around his whole midsection and Peter had to bite back a pained moan. 

Tony frowned, rubbing his flesh hand down Peter’s back in warm circles. “You want me to call Andrea yet?” he asked.

“Uh uh. He probably wouldn’t come out yet anyway. It’s not - they’re still not that close together just… hurt,” Peter grimaced, shifting a little to try and take some of the pressure off of his back.

“I know. It’ll be over soon hopefully,” Tony said, shifting to sit behind Peter so he could rub his back. At least the best that he could while still not being able to control some of the finer movements of the prosthetic.

\---

_The first Christmas after Thanos had snapped was… weird._

_Peter just felt hollow. Numb. Even as everyone decorated for the holiday and snow fell. At least Tony was back. But with May, Ned, and MJ gone Peter didn’t really feel like celebrating. _

_So he didn’t._

_Instead he slipped away to take a walk down to the pier. He didn’t care that it was only 20 degrees and that there was snow falling. Peter just pulled on his boots and put on his winter coat on over Tony’s faded MIT hoodie he was wearing. Instantly he felt better - the cold and quiet soothing the ache deep in his chest just a little bit. _

_Peter wasn’t sure how long he’d been outside when a very concerned Tony found him and ushered him back in - grumbling and fussing the whole way about Peter not being careful and worrying him so much. _

_Not that Peter even heard most of it. Too zoned out._

_As soon as Tony was convinced that Peter didn’t have any frostbite or hypothermia to worry about, Peter managed to slip away to their room. He just didn’t want to talk to anyone - even Tony - right now. _

\---

12 hours.

It had been 12 hours since Peter woke up with contractions and, while definitely in labor, it didn’t feel like hardly any progress had been made. The contractions were down to 5 minutes apart but that was it.

They had let everyone know about Ben’s impending arrival and Peter had been trying to stay upright in hopes that gravity would help speed things along. Walking around and at one point in time spending a few minutes in a hot shower to help his back pain. 

Right now, Peter was resting. Trying to stretch out his back by kneeling on the floor and leaning against a yoga ball. It was the only position even somewhat comfortable for him at the moment with the amount of pressure on his spine.

And thank God for Steve offering to rub his back. Kneeling behind him and kneading the tense muscles in Peter’s lower back. Tony could only do so much and, honestly, the cold vibranium didn’t help soothe his muscles at all. 

“I think my water just broke,” Peter muttered as the thought filtered through his mind. Warm fluid slowly soaking his sweatpants. He looked up at Tony who was sitting nearby on the couch as Steve’s hands stilled. “Um… Can you call Andrea?” Peter asked, figuring he'd probably want to get out there.

“Already on it,” Tony said.

\---

_ ”Are you sure that’s like… acceptable? I feel like there’d be about a million HR regulations being broken if I did that,” Peter said skeptically when Tony suggested Peter applying to work at SI._

_“It’s fine. I stepped down as CEO. Pepper handles everything now,” Tony said. “You’d go through the hiring process like everyone else. If whoever you interview with doesn’t think you’d be a good fit then so be it. But, baby, you’re brilliant. I highly doubt they’d say no.”_

_“I guess,” Peter shrugged. One of his dreams growing up was to work at Stark Industries but now that he was dating Tony where he worked didn’t seem as important so long as he got a decently paying job that he liked._

_Not that he really needed a job dating Tony but he wanted one. Peter didn’t want to constantly ask Tony for money. And he wanted to be prepared in case they ever broke up. _

_Peter was still surprised when he got the job with absolutely no push back from HR or Pepper. _

_Of course, when the press found out they didn’t go so easy on them but, by this point, Peter was able to ignore most of what was printed or said on the news about them. It was all white noise. No one was actually coming after them and it didn’t affect Peter’s life except for a few annoying reporters that didn’t want to leave him alone. _

_Not that it mattered when literally all of Peter’s dreams were coming true. _

\---

Honestly, Peter was about to give up on the whole natural birth thing. The only thing stopping him from giving in and asking to go to the hospital for an epidural was knowing the nearest hospital was still pretty far away from them and sitting in a car for 45 minutes sounded like torture with how his back felt.

Anyways, Andrea said he was almost fully dilated. 

But he was also exhausted and absolutely miserable. Last time he looked at the time it was almost 2 AM and that felt like ages ago. 

By now walking more than a few feet was impossible with how close the contractions were so he pretty much stuck to their bed. Shifting around in different positions but nothing was even remotely comfortable. The least uncomfortable position he found was kneeling and leaning against someone. 

Right now that someone was Pepper - at Peter’s request because Tony wasn't strong enough to support him yet. He didn’t really want anyone on the team to see him like this… or May. May would panic. But Peter knew that Pepper wouldn’t make things weird or freak out when things got serious and she was more than happy to help out. Even at 2AM on Christmas Eve.

Tony stayed close by. As close as possible without getting in the way, smoothing down Peter’s hair and muttering words of encouragement and praise. 

“Well,” Andrea started after doing a quick exam, “You’re at a 10. You’re free to push whenever you start to feel the urge.”

“Fucking finally,” Peter groaned, feeling mildly better knowing that this would be over relatively soon. 

That urge to push came a few contractions later and Peter didn’t hesitate to bear down against it - following Andrea’s instructions to only push when he felt like he needed to. 

The pressure only got worse, though, and even in the small space between contractions Peter couldn’t stop the little whimpers of discomfort. The only thing keeping him grounded was Tony’s hand playing with his hair and his fiance’s voice reminding him to breathe. 

Other than the unbearable pressure, pushing didn’t seem to be doing anything. Andrea said he was making progress but it definitely didn’t feel like it and Peter wasn’t sure how much longer he could keep going for. 

“The baby’s head is right there about to start crowning, Peter, you’re doing great,” Andrea assured.

“Did you hear that, Pete? You’re almost done,” Pepper said softly when Peter didn’t react. 

Peter nodded against her shoulder but that’s all he was able to do before he was pushing again. “Oh fuck,” Peter hissed when a burning sensation worse than anything he’s ever felt before lit up his lower half. He clung to Pepper tighter, gritting his teeth and gasping in a breath of air when spots started to dance along his vision. 

And it only got worse.

Peter was almost sure he was dying. 

Everything else seemed to fade away and Peter hardly even registered that he was even saying anything.

“Oh my God, fuck, fuck, fuck m-make it stop, make it stop, please, fuck, I-I can’t - I can’t do this - Tony… Please,” he sobbed, his whole body shaking.

“You’re almost there, baby boy, just a few more pushes and we’ll have our son,” Tony soothed - though his voice sounded far away despite Peter knowing he was right beside him, “You’re doing so good, sweetheart. You’re so strong I know you can do this. Just a little more. We can see the baby’s head. It’s almost out.”

“No,” Peter whimpered, “N-No I- I can’t I -” Peter’s words cut off into a scream only slightly muffled by Pepper’s shoulder when another contraction came and Peter had to push again. He didn’t even have a choice in the matter by this point, his body doing it all without his active participation. 

After that, Peter wasn’t even aware of anything else except for the pain coursing through him. The pain and dizziness and the bright spots that danced around his eyes when he squeezed them shut. He couldn’t breathe and was only vaguely aware that he was still screaming. 

It was only a matter of time before he passed out, he was sure of it.

Before that could happen, though, with the sickening feeling of something being ripped from his body, all of the sharp, burning pain stopped. 

At first Peter thought that he might have actually died. But he could still feel Pepper’s hands rubbing his back as he slumped against her and Tony’s hand in his hair. 

Then, even through the ringing in his ears, he heard a baby crying.

It took maybe longer than it should have to realize that it was _his_ baby crying. 

After that all the other noises filtered in and slowly Peter managed to open his eyes and blink away the lingering spots that clouded his vision. 

“C’mon Peter, you with us? You did it, baby,” Tony said, breathless and worried. 

Peter managed to turn his head to look Tony, still trying to catch his breath. He slowly loosened his grip that he had on Pepper’s shirt, fingers aching and tingling as blood flow slowly returned to them. 

“Oh my God,” Peter gasped when his gaze dropped to look at the messy, squirming newborn in Tony’s arms.

“Oh, Peter, he’s perfect,” Pepper cooed - despite the fact that the infant was still covered in blood and birth fluids. 

Feeling all sorts of weak and shaky, Pepper and Andrea helped readjust him so he could lie back against the pile of pillows at the head of the bed and Tony carefully handed Ben over.

“Hey, sweetie,” Peter whispered, cradling Ben against his chest, trying to wrap his head around everything that just happened. That their son was finally there with them.

Everything happened in a blur after that. Pepper stepped out to update everyone who was awake and Peter’s head was still spinning.

Delivering the afterbirth was unpleasant but nothing Peter couldn’t handle and he wasn’t surprised when Andrea said that he had torn. With how much it hurt he figured that had to be the case. The midwife wouldn’t say exactly how bad it was which worried Peter just a little but he did say it would heal in a few weeks. 

By the time everything was all said and done - baby cleaned and swaddled, birth certificate signed, Peter showered, the bed sheets changed - it was nearly 7AM. 

“I’m never doing that again,” Peter muttered while he fed Ben, leaning his head against Tony’s shoulder as they sat side by side on the bed. The leftover adrenaline being the only thing keeping Peter awake right now.

“So… no second kid?” Tony chuckled, pressing a kiss against Peter’s shower-damp hair.

“Didn’t say that. Just… gonna have a C-section next time,” Peter amended. 

“God, you’re amazing,” Tony breathed. 

Peter couldn’t help but laugh softly. “So… You’re done being mad at me, then?” he asked. 

“Um…” Tony faltered. "I mean… I really want to be an ass right now and say uh… what was it again? That you said before? 'Not if you say it like that'."

Peter rolled his eyes at Tony. "But you're not going to?"

"I think you've earned a free pass this time," Tony shrugged. “So yeah. I’m done being mad, baby."

Peter grinned even as the bits of adrenaline faded and exhaustion took over. Once Ben was done eating Tony took him to settle him into the bassinet and Peter was asleep before Tony even had the chance to come back and lay down with him.


	14. But I'm not scared at all of the cracks in the crystal ball

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well... this is it, guys.
> 
> I really hope you enjoy this last chapter. Thank you all SO MUCH for supporting me through this story and being so wonderful with all your comments and kudos. I appreciate it way more than I could ever express <3 <3 <3
> 
> That being said, leave a comment if you'd like me to turn this into a series. I, for one, don't want this AU to end here because it's been so fun to write and there's still a lot more to be told but this particular story had run its course.

The new parents didn’t emerge from their bed until late afternoon when they were woken up for what felt like the millionth time by their new bundle of joy. 

Peter wasn’t surprised when he walked - well, limped - out and saw that May and Happy had come over. May rushed over immediately to get a good look at Ben. All bundled up and, for now, quiet and content held in Peter’s arms. 

“Oh my God, Peter, he’s so cute,” she cooed, “Can I hold him?”

“Of course,” Peter grinned, carefully transferring Ben over. “You have to give everyone else a turn, too, though,” he said. 

“You mean I can’t just steal him and bring him home with me?” May teased.

“No. Not after all the work I put in to get him here,” Peter chuckled. 

“How’re you feeling, Pete? I’m assuming everything went okay since you’re here and not in a hospital,” May said. “You look exhausted. Both of you do.”

“I am,” Peter sighed. “This little guy didn’t let us get any sleep even after he was born.” Peter couldn’t help a smile when Ben cooed back at May and reached out to grab onto her shirt. “We thought everyone would want to meet him, though, and I am absolutely starving.”

“We’ll probably go back to bed after eating something,” Tony said. 

“Good idea,” May agreed. “There’s a few plates waiting for you to heat up so go eat,” she urged, “I’ll make sure everyone gets a chance to meet Ben.”

“Thanks, May,” Peter smiled. 

“You go sit down and rest. I’ll bring you some food,” Tony said, kissing the top of Peter’s head. “You’ve done enough work today.” 

“I’m not even going to argue this time,” Peter said with a soft laugh, making his way into the living room with May and gingerly sitting down in his corner of the couch that he had noticed no one had dared to touch the arrangement of blankets and pillows. 

Almost instantly Bucky, Steve, and Happy were surrounding May to see Ben. He didn’t seem to mind the attention as they all cooed over him and Peter just watched with a smile on his face. 

Though he couldn’t help but notice the way that Happy’s hand lingered on May’s shoulder or how comfortable they seemed so close together. 

He filed that way for later. Way too tired to have that conversation right now.

“We should have one,” Bucky declared, wrapping an arm around Steve’s waist and pulling him a little closer. 

“No,” Steve shook his head.

“Yes.”

“No. No. Not yet,” Steve said. “We don’t even know if we _can_ have one.”

“Sure we can. Even if it’s not biological we could adopt,” Bucky pointed out, earning an eye roll from Steve.

“Only if we can adopt Ben.”

“Not gonna happen,” Peter intervened. “This one’s mine. Pretty sure I get first dibs on him after spending 25 hours in labor and almost one hour pushing to get him here. And the nine months growing him before that.” 

“That’s a fair point,” Bucky agreed with a wince. 

"What's a fair point?" Tony asked as he handed Peter a plate of food and sat down next to him.

"That I get first dibs on the baby because I made him," Peter said with a laugh.

"I think I'm missing something here… what?" Tony asked.

"Steve and Bucky are trying to steal Ben," Peter explained. 

"Look, Steve said the only way we can have a baby is if we adopt Ben. You guys were planning on having another one anyway, right?" Bucky teased, absolutely beaming when May passed Ben over to him. 

“Y’know, I think I have to agree with Peter on this one,” Tony said. “Sorry, Buck, this little guy is ours.” 

Tony and Peter stayed up for a little while longer. Until May and Happy left - which, again, Peter decided not to say anything at the moment about how they left together and how he was almost sure he saw Happy’s hand on the small of May’s back as they walked out.

But after that - and after prying Ben away from Steve - they laid back down together. 

That Christmas was a rather calm one. Everyone that was nearby came over to meet Ben but there wasn’t any drinking or party games like usual when the Avengers got together casually. Peter stayed curled up in the corner of the sectional and, for once, let Tony take care of him. He was sore in ways he never imagined possible and still exhausted - but they had a newborn now so what else was expected?

Though Peter had to admit, this was probably one of the best Christmas’ he’s had. He and Tony managed to start a family of their own and Peter’s Aunt and friends were there.

\---

“Darling, you’re going to make us late for our own wedding, I need to get ready,” Peter reprimanded, even as he continued to meet Tony for slow, loving kisses.

“They can wait,” Tony said, pulling Peter closer.

“Yeah, but I can't,” Peter said, playfully shoving Tony away. “Now go. You gotta get ready still, too.”

“Fine,” Tony huffed, leaning in for one more soft kiss. “I love you, babe.”

“I love you, too. Now leave,” Peter said, ushering Tony out the door. 

They had decided to just have a small wedding on their property. Now that they had decided on a cute little wooden lake house. Well, little being relative to most of the other houses they looked at. There was still enough room for them to add to their family and the property was more than big enough to build on if they chose to.

So Peter was getting ready in their bedroom - having booted Tony out to the guest room. 

Ned and MJ joined him soon after - MJ fussing over his hair and Ned making sure his tie looked good. They were both already ready in their matching grey suits, bright blue ties contrasting the darker color (MJ insisted on a tux and Peter had quickly vetoed Tony’s request for red-and-gold in favor of some more summery colors since they were getting married in the middle of July.)

Peter dressed in white - well, ivory because apparently there was a difference - but kept the blue tie. 

By now he’d managed to work off most of the baby weight but there were some changes that Peter only had to assume would be permanent. His hips had widened out a little, creating more of a curve that prevented him from being able to wear any of his pre-pregnancy jeans, and a stubborn little pouch of extra skin around his stomach. That wasn’t noticeable under most shirts, though, especially with the professional fittings that Peter had gone through for the custom-made suit. 

And, despite Tony’s interruptions, Peter managed to get ready in time and only hoped that Tony had, too.

And that the chairs were all set up outside.

And that Tessa - the dog they had accidentally adopted (it was a long story) - wasn’t tripping everyone or destroying anything.

And that Ben was content with May and wouldn’t start screaming and crying in the middle of the ceremony. 

And…

All of a sudden Peter didn’t feel so great. He hadn’t been anxious at all beforehand but now he couldn’t get his heart to stop pounding in his chest and breathing seemed a little more difficult.

“Pete, you okay?” Ned asked, “You just got like… really pale. You’re not gonna puke, are you?”

Peter shook his head. “No,” he muttered, taking in a deep breath and slowly letting it out. 

“Nerves finally getting to you?” MJ asked, Peter nodding in response. “It’ll be okay. When we came in almost everything was set up and I really don’t think Tony’s going to bolt on you,” she chuckled.

“I wasn’t worried about Tony,” Peter said with a small smile - he knew that Tony would be there. Even if he was a minute or two late. “Okay,” he said after a few moments, “Let’s go, I guess.”

Turns out all of those worries were for nothing. 

Everything was set up perfectly, Tony was standing at the archway in front of Pepper - who had gotten ordained just to marry them after they had joked about it once - with Happy and Rhodey at his side. And Tessa, for once, was on her best behavior. Even as she trotted up to join Peter as he walked towards his soon-to-be husband. Ben didn’t cry or fuss once and everyone was there.

And maybe there were more than a few tears spilled as they said their vows and Tony pulled Peter in with his vibranium arm to kiss him when Pepper gave them the go-ahead. It wasn’t the best kiss by any means, a little too hard as they met eagerly and the taste of salt from shared tears lingering on their lips.

But as far as Peter was concerned, it was perfect because it was the first kiss they shared together as husbands.

The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I hope you all enjoyed this last chapter and this story as a whole.
> 
> PLEASE comment if you want me to make this a series!!! Even a small heart or something. Just so I know who would read a sequel or some one-shots set in the same AU. 
> 
> Thank you all again for your support <3 <3


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